in need of advice - financial issues

So really quickly, thank you for all your input and advice. She came over to our part of the house to "apologize". She hugged my husband and then tried to kiss him and he didn't let her. She told him that she was incredibly sorry for the things she said and the way she acted and want to reunite...but only with him. She then turned to me and said she was sorry. I told her that it was OK, that I forgive her. She then proceeded to tell me -"there is nothing on this earth that will stop me from becoming t's wife.". She then took 2 steps right up to me face to face and said "I am going to be t's wife. So you can either exit graciously now or I will take you down.". There seems to be quite a chunk of time missing from my memory, but from what I can remember from the moment she said that to the next thing I can remember is 2 deputy sheriffs standing in my living room one telling her she needed to leave and one telling my husband and I that we needed to go to the magistrate and serve her with s restraining order from us both. So we are headed to the sheriff's office and then to the lawyers tomorrow.

So I was wrong and most everybody else here was right. But now the gloves are off and the claws are out so now would be the time for her to mess with me. And if anybody is wondering what side my husband is on...he is standing beside me holding my hand and saying "me and you against everybody else. That was always the deal."

So again i sincerely thank you. Had I not come here for the simple question of finances, theres no telling how far it would have gone...
 
Good grief... I hope you get that injunction and permanent restraining order. She is crazy sounding. :(

Hang in there!

Galagirl
 
Oh wow! Has he at least quashed this prediction for her so she can see how behaving this way is only making things worse? I'm not trying to suggest he lead her to this belief. I'm just wondering if it has been made clear to her that this future where he leaves you and marries her is something that will not come to be?
Because if he HAS told her this and she still speaks in terms of this future she idealizes, it might become necessary to gain custody away from her due to mental instabilities. She sounds both crazy and menacing!
 
I think it would be near impossible to gain custody from her. She hasn't done anything to put the child in danger at this point. I think there will be large child support payments though which may or may not have an impact on OP and her current living situation.
 
Wow -- sorry to hear all that polygirl4347. It sounds to me like this woman is missing a few screws.
 
. . . She then turned to me and said she was sorry. I told her that it was OK, that I forgive her. She then proceeded to tell me -"there is nothing on this earth that will stop me from becoming t's wife.". She then took 2 steps right up to me face to face and said "I am going to be t's wife. So you can either exit graciously now or I will take you down.". There seems to be quite a chunk of time missing from my memory, but from what I can remember from the moment she said that to the next thing I can remember is 2 deputy sheriffs standing in my living room one telling her she needed to leave and one telling my husband and I that we needed to go to the magistrate and serve her with s restraining order from us both. So we are headed to the sheriff's office and then to the lawyers tomorrow.
I'm not a violent person, but as I read that, I was hoping that what happened during those moments you can't recall is that you slapped her hard across her face.

Not really, but, you know, someone like that.... stealing from you, threatening you, sheesh!

Get the restraining order ASAP. Put her shit out on the sidewalk. Have you cancelled all accounts and bills you were paying for her, and changed all your financial information, numbers, accounts, passwords, locks on all your doors and windows, alarm codes, etc., yet? If not, do it now.

Has your husband read this thread yet? I'd bet the baby isn't his.
 
Guuod ... I hope the baby isn't his.
 
polygirl4347,

I'm sure I'm not the only person in the forum who's wondering how you're doing. Drop us a line if you can. If not, know that we're thinking about you and hoping some sanity has come into your situation.

Best,
SlowPoly
 
You know, it's hard to really fathom crazy until you experience it. Sure, we all understand that people like this woman exist. But it's really hard to understand that she plotted for a year, played the role to gain their trust, only to reveal her true self after moving in. We would all like to believe we would see the red flags - and granted, the OP's husband made an error in not asking her about what the crazy woman was alleging (didn't love him, going to leave) - but it is also an indicator of the con artist's ability to convince.

I haven't experienced the level of crazy displayed here, but I have been faced with someone who occasionally had a difficult time telling reality. It wasn't aggressive like this woman, just mixed up. It's a very odd experience. At first, I was sure I had mistaken, was misreading. It's so bizarre, that a more logical answer was to think I might be missing something rather than to first consider your dear friend is in fact delusional.

You two have my sincerest sympathies.
 
I agree bookbug, crazy can be hard to detect until it reveals its true blinding colors.

And I agree with SlowPoly, we worry about you polygirl4347, come on back and let us know how things are going.
 
Sorry y'all, I've been meaning to come back for an update. We found out from her mother that she has a mental illness and she stopped taking her meds for a month and a half before she got pregnant because she thought that was what she was supposed to do. She never told us about it because she said she was ashamed. So that kinda changed things a little bit. I am not mad anymore, just sad that she thought she couldn't tell us. She is now back on safer meds and is almost back to normal. Unfortunately the damage has been done us as a trio, my husband and I are as solid as we have ever been, we are supporting her through the pregnancy, but that is as far as it goes. Maybe later on we can be friends, but right now my only concern is for this baby to be born safe and healthy.

Thanks for all of your comments and support, its been difficult to say the least, but we will get through
 
Oh,that is tough, if her mother is being truthful. Is the baby your husband's or someone else's? I do hope you will still protect yourselves and your financial information, passwords, etc., and not let her have access to anything. And just remember she does not have to live with you for you to help her with the baby. I hope the meds she is on now are okay to take while pregnant!
 
Thanks for your update polygirl4347; I guess some things are more easily explained now that we have some new information. I'm glad you're hanging in there; I know it's not easy.
 
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