Thread: Sex wait
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Old 03-19-2014, 06:53 PM
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SchrodingersCat SchrodingersCat is offline
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Originally Posted by Magdlyn View Post
Generally, I know from the first look if I am sexually attracted to someone or not. Then, I know there is chemistry from the first kiss. 4 months of making out and touching and NOW she decides she's not attracted? Excuse me?
I don't. I don't have a strong sex drive and my sexual attraction isn't based on visual stimulation. It takes me a while to become attracted to someone, and I can't predict at first whether I eventually will or not.

There are a lot of factors that go into sexual attraction for me, and none of them are looks. Smell, attitude, reactions to certain interactions or events either in our own lives or political etc., intelligence, ability to hold a stimulating conversation... Many of these things aren't readily apparent when you meet someone or even after a few weeks. Also, any one of them can suddenly kill my attraction in a single event. Maybe one day you say something completely ignorant and I realize you're a racist dick. *click* You're no longer sexy.

It's not about being a tease or playing games to mess with people's heads, it's just how I'm wired. Sexual attraction, for me with my low sex drive, is strongly correlated to emotional attraction, and that takes time to build. That being said, I'm usually upfront about this aspect of my personality, and people who aren't cool with that have the option to leave before they get involved, or else keep their heart minimally involved until we're both sure something is there.
As I am sure any cat owner will be able to tell you,
someone else putting you in a box is entirely different
from getting into a box yourself.
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