Squashking
Member
Hello Everyone,
As most of you know, the wonderful lifestyle we lead has some significant advantages to it. Being able to love and be loved by more than one but also the intimate connections as well.
But I can argue that there is a difference between making love (emotional connection) vs having sex. Any couple engaged in the act of swinging out there can attest that they are quite a bit different.
So after 3+ years in this lifestyle I have learned a lot about my own sexuality. I (we) have experienced a lot mind blowing events and we encouraged each other to experiment. The act is wonderful and intoxicating for myself and my partners.
I am however, surprised as to how much I crave the experimentation process and the pursuit of my boundaries. I and my OSO continually think of new ways to push to envelope. It's fun for both of us but I am always wanting more. I think about it all the time (a lot!) and I worry that I will convince myself to go outside of the relationship to continue this discovery. I know they worry about me in this regard.
A healthy sexual libido is one thing, but when thoughts & fantasies go beyond your relationships, acting upon them can only leave to destruction.
I feel that I can write a book about what it takes to lead a successful Poly lifestyle, but these triggers are very powerful and it feels like I become a different person.
So what shall I do about this?
I have attended a few "sex addicts annonymous" group meetings. But, my situation is different to most. The question I ponder is... what is considered healthy and what is considered destructive? I find that there is a very thin line between the two.
Thanks for listening.
~S
As most of you know, the wonderful lifestyle we lead has some significant advantages to it. Being able to love and be loved by more than one but also the intimate connections as well.
But I can argue that there is a difference between making love (emotional connection) vs having sex. Any couple engaged in the act of swinging out there can attest that they are quite a bit different.
So after 3+ years in this lifestyle I have learned a lot about my own sexuality. I (we) have experienced a lot mind blowing events and we encouraged each other to experiment. The act is wonderful and intoxicating for myself and my partners.
I am however, surprised as to how much I crave the experimentation process and the pursuit of my boundaries. I and my OSO continually think of new ways to push to envelope. It's fun for both of us but I am always wanting more. I think about it all the time (a lot!) and I worry that I will convince myself to go outside of the relationship to continue this discovery. I know they worry about me in this regard.
A healthy sexual libido is one thing, but when thoughts & fantasies go beyond your relationships, acting upon them can only leave to destruction.
I feel that I can write a book about what it takes to lead a successful Poly lifestyle, but these triggers are very powerful and it feels like I become a different person.
So what shall I do about this?
I have attended a few "sex addicts annonymous" group meetings. But, my situation is different to most. The question I ponder is... what is considered healthy and what is considered destructive? I find that there is a very thin line between the two.
Thanks for listening.
~S
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