Hi everyone,
So my husband and I just decided last week that this is what we want to do. At first I was super turned on when he talked about being with another woman. Now, I'm not sure if it's Pms or what, but I find myself feeling insecure about myself which affects how I feel when we talk about it. I still want him to date other people (and him for me) but my insecurities stem more from hoping other guys will be attracted to me. We have been married for fifteen years so obviously not used to the typical dating scene. Also, I am a bit hippyish and decided to stop dying my hair so it's now mostly gray. i actually like the hair color but I worry about it being a turn off. I know my concerns seem soooo superficial.
On another note in regard to dating.... I realized that I hope we can find a good balance between dating each other and dating other people. He and I got to a point where we stopped going on dates and I want to rekindle that again. I guess I want to feel like I am not just the person he married but that our love feels fresh again. Does that make sense? If we are going to have new and fresh relationships then I want our relationship to feel fresh again too.
Don't get me wrong--- we have a very deep bond and are very much in love. Nothing will tear us apart and my husband keeps reminding me of that.
I guess I mainly want to know if these insecurities are normal at this stage since it's so early on?
Edited to add: I might feel more confident once I actually start talking to people. My husband is a bit more bold and seems to be a lot more motivated to find someone right away. He already signed up for openminded.com and okcupid and is talking to me about women who are a match. I'm not jealous that he found people but I guess I am starting to feel a bit unbalanced... if that makes sense? since I haven't done much of anything yet besides introduce myself here and join a Meetup group that i haven't attended yet.
So my husband and I just decided last week that this is what we want to do. At first I was super turned on when he talked about being with another woman. Now, I'm not sure if it's Pms or what, but I find myself feeling insecure about myself which affects how I feel when we talk about it. I still want him to date other people (and him for me) but my insecurities stem more from hoping other guys will be attracted to me. We have been married for fifteen years so obviously not used to the typical dating scene. Also, I am a bit hippyish and decided to stop dying my hair so it's now mostly gray. i actually like the hair color but I worry about it being a turn off. I know my concerns seem soooo superficial.
On another note in regard to dating.... I realized that I hope we can find a good balance between dating each other and dating other people. He and I got to a point where we stopped going on dates and I want to rekindle that again. I guess I want to feel like I am not just the person he married but that our love feels fresh again. Does that make sense? If we are going to have new and fresh relationships then I want our relationship to feel fresh again too.
Don't get me wrong--- we have a very deep bond and are very much in love. Nothing will tear us apart and my husband keeps reminding me of that.
I guess I mainly want to know if these insecurities are normal at this stage since it's so early on?
Edited to add: I might feel more confident once I actually start talking to people. My husband is a bit more bold and seems to be a lot more motivated to find someone right away. He already signed up for openminded.com and okcupid and is talking to me about women who are a match. I'm not jealous that he found people but I guess I am starting to feel a bit unbalanced... if that makes sense? since I haven't done much of anything yet besides introduce myself here and join a Meetup group that i haven't attended yet.
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