It took time to develop the emotional attachment I have with my boyfriend and he knows that at this point, the only real danger to our emotional connection is him pulling away and distancing himself from me [which he's done as a result of this issue].
he . . . worries any guy I'm with will want to steal me away. But he also understands that *I* also would need to want to leave him and he understands that I... am... polyamorous.
. . . he's been quite adamant about not wanting to develop relationships with anyone I've been with [quite opposite to what we've always agreed we both needed in a polyamorous relationship]. But he's always encouraged men and women alike to explore their sexuality and be open. His last two long-term relationships grew out of NSA relationships, a point he emphasizes often whenever people criticize the lifestyle choice -- he sees people being open about sexuality a sign of strength rather than weakness.
I really am baffled because on every level, he really is the guy I want and love. In every aspect he thinks/feels/acts in ways I respect and want in a partner... but somehow when it comes to ME, to his future wife, it switches up.