Hello, thanks for reading my post and thanks in advance for any responses.
So, about me...
I'm a 45 yo divorced (2011, 6 years) father of two daughters, 11 and 13.* I have a strong and healthy relationship with their mom and her husband (just friends).* My daughters are and always will be my number one priority even though I do not have custody.
I have always taught them to think critically and use their best judgement on how to live life, how to treat others, and how to be happy...I think I've been hypocritical since I have hurt too many women and myself in these short term relationships.
Since my separation/divorce I've had a few relationships with women. They were all monogamous, and I ended all of them but one; that woman broke my heart.* I did have two friends with benefits that ended well though.
I ended the others because I felt smothered and I know I have commitment issues from my divorce and childhood problems.* I seem to subconsciously think there is someone better out there or that nothing good ever lasts...a topic for another discussion
I did and still do care for these women, maybe even truly loved some of them, but usually after three months my mind wanders to thinking I don't love them enough to continue, I want something more or different, blah, blah... They all wanted me to be the "end all, be all" guy and I never had those feelings.
These may have been the end of New Relationship Energy (NRE) or its just not love? The sex is usually pretty awesome and I've tried a lot of new things with these ladies. So sex has never been an issue and sex is very important and high priority* to me once we get there.
So should I go with Poly?
I know I can love multiple women, I can accept them loving others ( I think), I can eventually explain this to my daughters, I love to have my own time, I'm not homophobic so threesomes are not out (don't know if that's popular in poly relationships?); and I really want a healthy, strong, communicative, and happy relationship or relationships.*
That's me in a nutshell so the question is...
Am I looking for polyamory?*
So, about me...
I'm a 45 yo divorced (2011, 6 years) father of two daughters, 11 and 13.* I have a strong and healthy relationship with their mom and her husband (just friends).* My daughters are and always will be my number one priority even though I do not have custody.
I have always taught them to think critically and use their best judgement on how to live life, how to treat others, and how to be happy...I think I've been hypocritical since I have hurt too many women and myself in these short term relationships.
Since my separation/divorce I've had a few relationships with women. They were all monogamous, and I ended all of them but one; that woman broke my heart.* I did have two friends with benefits that ended well though.
I ended the others because I felt smothered and I know I have commitment issues from my divorce and childhood problems.* I seem to subconsciously think there is someone better out there or that nothing good ever lasts...a topic for another discussion
I did and still do care for these women, maybe even truly loved some of them, but usually after three months my mind wanders to thinking I don't love them enough to continue, I want something more or different, blah, blah... They all wanted me to be the "end all, be all" guy and I never had those feelings.
These may have been the end of New Relationship Energy (NRE) or its just not love? The sex is usually pretty awesome and I've tried a lot of new things with these ladies. So sex has never been an issue and sex is very important and high priority* to me once we get there.
So should I go with Poly?
I know I can love multiple women, I can accept them loving others ( I think), I can eventually explain this to my daughters, I love to have my own time, I'm not homophobic so threesomes are not out (don't know if that's popular in poly relationships?); and I really want a healthy, strong, communicative, and happy relationship or relationships.*
That's me in a nutshell so the question is...
Am I looking for polyamory?*