One of the reasons--I think probably the biggest reason, based on what he's said--that S2 isn't seeing or seeking any other partner is because of the fluid bonding issue. It could have destroyed our relationship.
He and I used condoms for the first month and a half we were together. At one point after we knew each other well, because his profile on the site where we met states clearly that he was looking for someone who would eventually be willing to forgo condoms, I talked to him about fluid bonding, including getting the assurance that I was the first person he'd had sex with since the end of his 14-year marriage. At the time, S2 said he felt like it was too soon for us to take that step... though a week later, it accidentally happened. (Yes, legitimately by accident, as unbelievable as that sounds.)
But... a few weeks after he and I fluid bonded, he had a date with another woman from that site. Someone he'd been talking with online but had never met before. And on that date, he had unprotected sex with her.
Two weeks later, he "felt weird" and was tested for STDs, and had to confess to me that he'd had unprotected sex with her and that I should probably be tested...and so should Hubby. Until then, he hadn't even told me he'd had sex with her at all, let alone that they hadn't used condoms. That made me angry, and I was hurt that a month and a half was "too soon" for him to fluid bond with me but he'd done so on the first date with her. And I told him so. He was afraid he'd lost me; we were both afraid Hubby would tell me to stop seeing S2. Neither happened, and fortunately his tests and mine came back clean. (Hubby despises doctors, and had chosen not to get tested unless I tested positive for something.)
Because of that, he told the other woman he wouldn't be seeing her again, and told me that he'd pretty much decided he needed to stay exclusive with me so he wouldn't make any further "stupid choices." He also promised me that, if that changes, he will tell me immediately if he has sex with someone else, and he will use condoms with them until they're tested. But so far, he's still saying he's going to stick with only seeing me.
He and I used condoms for the first month and a half we were together. At one point after we knew each other well, because his profile on the site where we met states clearly that he was looking for someone who would eventually be willing to forgo condoms, I talked to him about fluid bonding, including getting the assurance that I was the first person he'd had sex with since the end of his 14-year marriage. At the time, S2 said he felt like it was too soon for us to take that step... though a week later, it accidentally happened. (Yes, legitimately by accident, as unbelievable as that sounds.)
But... a few weeks after he and I fluid bonded, he had a date with another woman from that site. Someone he'd been talking with online but had never met before. And on that date, he had unprotected sex with her.
Two weeks later, he "felt weird" and was tested for STDs, and had to confess to me that he'd had unprotected sex with her and that I should probably be tested...and so should Hubby. Until then, he hadn't even told me he'd had sex with her at all, let alone that they hadn't used condoms. That made me angry, and I was hurt that a month and a half was "too soon" for him to fluid bond with me but he'd done so on the first date with her. And I told him so. He was afraid he'd lost me; we were both afraid Hubby would tell me to stop seeing S2. Neither happened, and fortunately his tests and mine came back clean. (Hubby despises doctors, and had chosen not to get tested unless I tested positive for something.)
Because of that, he told the other woman he wouldn't be seeing her again, and told me that he'd pretty much decided he needed to stay exclusive with me so he wouldn't make any further "stupid choices." He also promised me that, if that changes, he will tell me immediately if he has sex with someone else, and he will use condoms with them until they're tested. But so far, he's still saying he's going to stick with only seeing me.