Amethystsparrow
New member
Hello again everyone,
I'm sorry to be so negative and only just have joined, but I've nowhere else to vent that wouldn't come back at me two fold in some way or fashion. I honestly do not know why I feel such unrest, distress and overall this awful feeling but yet I have it. For the past month I have been wanting to sit down and discuss boundaries, serious concerns and other such matters with both my partners, but each time I try Sunshine is having a 'bad day' or Snarky throws a distractive curveball and says " Hey instead lets plan a ceremony!" when we really should not be planning something like this only having started this relationship late September.
Maybe I'm starting to come down from the 'newness high' and really look at things in more serious detail. I was planning on discussing things with both of them tomorrow when Sunshine returned from work, but she messages him ( without letting me know) that she wants him at her place tomorrow night; I usually would be ok with this, but feel disconnected from her and I am so frustrated that this talk keeps getting pushed off, and whenever i mention that it keeps getting pushed off I get groans or exasperation. I have serious concerns that need addressed, for example Sunshine wants a child...I would be ok with this IF our relationship was at least 3 years strong and not in just a " years time" what if this goes south? what if there is a child and this doesn't work?! having been in an awful divorced family situation growing up as a child I know first hand how things go between estranged families, it's terrible and I do not want that for a child! I also want to discuss utilizing protection aside from 'pull out method' but all i hear is complaints about how un-comfy they are.
I honestly say they need to suck it up. I'm getting scared now, things are moving TOO fast and I am terrified things are going to come crashing down. I NEED to have this discussion with them because these are serious issues and the more it gets pushed aside the faster I want to pull the plug. i'll lose my best friend, but at this rate I'd rather that then have everything blow up and a child get in the middle of it. I know she is desperate for her solo time with him, but she is also starting to become too dependent on just 'solo' time instead of being content with group..what on earth should i do? am I just stressing and seeing things out of proportion? or am I waking up and realizing this is a terrible idea if things continue to go so fast?
I'm sorry to be so negative and only just have joined, but I've nowhere else to vent that wouldn't come back at me two fold in some way or fashion. I honestly do not know why I feel such unrest, distress and overall this awful feeling but yet I have it. For the past month I have been wanting to sit down and discuss boundaries, serious concerns and other such matters with both my partners, but each time I try Sunshine is having a 'bad day' or Snarky throws a distractive curveball and says " Hey instead lets plan a ceremony!" when we really should not be planning something like this only having started this relationship late September.
Maybe I'm starting to come down from the 'newness high' and really look at things in more serious detail. I was planning on discussing things with both of them tomorrow when Sunshine returned from work, but she messages him ( without letting me know) that she wants him at her place tomorrow night; I usually would be ok with this, but feel disconnected from her and I am so frustrated that this talk keeps getting pushed off, and whenever i mention that it keeps getting pushed off I get groans or exasperation. I have serious concerns that need addressed, for example Sunshine wants a child...I would be ok with this IF our relationship was at least 3 years strong and not in just a " years time" what if this goes south? what if there is a child and this doesn't work?! having been in an awful divorced family situation growing up as a child I know first hand how things go between estranged families, it's terrible and I do not want that for a child! I also want to discuss utilizing protection aside from 'pull out method' but all i hear is complaints about how un-comfy they are.
I honestly say they need to suck it up. I'm getting scared now, things are moving TOO fast and I am terrified things are going to come crashing down. I NEED to have this discussion with them because these are serious issues and the more it gets pushed aside the faster I want to pull the plug. i'll lose my best friend, but at this rate I'd rather that then have everything blow up and a child get in the middle of it. I know she is desperate for her solo time with him, but she is also starting to become too dependent on just 'solo' time instead of being content with group..what on earth should i do? am I just stressing and seeing things out of proportion? or am I waking up and realizing this is a terrible idea if things continue to go so fast?