Hello, I'm Alli. Sorry this is long but I feel you need some background info and that I need to talk to someone to help sort things out. I found out a few months ago what polyamory was and was so happy to see that I am not alone in loving more than one person. I have been in a monogamous relationship for 10 years with Dave and we are not married; he is my high school sweetheart. I have never had sex with anyone except him, or been in a serious relationship with anyone other than him.
We have almost broken up a few times because I have strong feelings towards people who I am close with. I have always felt like a bad person for having these feelings and always feel guilty and like I'm cheating on him in my head and heart even though I have never cheated physically. I never wanted to break up with him because I do love him, but with how I was raised I assumed the fact that I had feelings for another person meant something was wrong with my current relationship.
We are very open with each other and talk a lot, I told him of how I feel and he actually told me about polyamory. He was the LBGQT club president at his college, he strongly supports being an ally of other sexualities and that they should have equal rights. He is strait and monogamous. Even though he is so open minded he is very jealous of my feelings toward others.
We are in college and have roommates, both I which I am in love with. He knows this. Dave is still trying to wrap his head around what our lives will be like with me identifying as poly. He is not sure if he can handle how I feel and so far isn't open to letting me have another intimate relationship. So far my two (male) roommates are like best friends to me. Roommate A was very close to me but backed off and freaked out when I told him I liked him as more than a friend (this was during my almost breakup with Dave last year). We have become friends again but he made it clear he wasn't comfortable with the situation, he said he views me as a sister. He does not know I'm poly.
Roommate B and I are very close (best friend level) and we were on a drive and he asked me about what had happened the previous year during the almost break up with Dave and what happened between me and roommate A; since we are close I opened up to him and explained how I feel about others and that I have feelings for him. Ends up he is poly too and totally understands, he also likes me. So far we have stayed at a level of good friendship and have not done anything physical since Dave is not on board with me being in other romantic/physical relationships.
It just sucks because there is someone I live with who accepts me and understands me and likes me too and I really want to act on it and be physical with him. Uuuuuuuggghhh. I feel anxious and guilty all the time because I really do love Dave, but I also could have a wonderful full relationship with roommate B. I hope what I have said is clear, I'm sure I've missed things, sorry for any spelling errors as well I'm writing on my cell phone. Thanks for your time �� this is sort of a rant haha.
We have almost broken up a few times because I have strong feelings towards people who I am close with. I have always felt like a bad person for having these feelings and always feel guilty and like I'm cheating on him in my head and heart even though I have never cheated physically. I never wanted to break up with him because I do love him, but with how I was raised I assumed the fact that I had feelings for another person meant something was wrong with my current relationship.
We are very open with each other and talk a lot, I told him of how I feel and he actually told me about polyamory. He was the LBGQT club president at his college, he strongly supports being an ally of other sexualities and that they should have equal rights. He is strait and monogamous. Even though he is so open minded he is very jealous of my feelings toward others.
We are in college and have roommates, both I which I am in love with. He knows this. Dave is still trying to wrap his head around what our lives will be like with me identifying as poly. He is not sure if he can handle how I feel and so far isn't open to letting me have another intimate relationship. So far my two (male) roommates are like best friends to me. Roommate A was very close to me but backed off and freaked out when I told him I liked him as more than a friend (this was during my almost breakup with Dave last year). We have become friends again but he made it clear he wasn't comfortable with the situation, he said he views me as a sister. He does not know I'm poly.
Roommate B and I are very close (best friend level) and we were on a drive and he asked me about what had happened the previous year during the almost break up with Dave and what happened between me and roommate A; since we are close I opened up to him and explained how I feel about others and that I have feelings for him. Ends up he is poly too and totally understands, he also likes me. So far we have stayed at a level of good friendship and have not done anything physical since Dave is not on board with me being in other romantic/physical relationships.
It just sucks because there is someone I live with who accepts me and understands me and likes me too and I really want to act on it and be physical with him. Uuuuuuuggghhh. I feel anxious and guilty all the time because I really do love Dave, but I also could have a wonderful full relationship with roommate B. I hope what I have said is clear, I'm sure I've missed things, sorry for any spelling errors as well I'm writing on my cell phone. Thanks for your time �� this is sort of a rant haha.
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