Limiting Age in a Poly Group

Re:
"Anyone who reads my Circle of a friends over in the fireplace could probably easily get that."

If I have to be in the fireplace while I read it, I hope someone puts out the fire first. :cool:
 
Circle of friends in Fireplace

Re:


If I have to be in the fireplace while I read it, I hope someone puts out the fire first. :cool:

Well you know me. It comes with its own built in incindaries
 
You know the old saying, "If you can't take the heat, stay out of the fireplace!" Er, wait, I think that's stay out of the kitchen. :D

Fortunately we don't have a Kitchen board (yet), therefore that old saying doesn't have to be entered into the equation.
 
Emotional age vs brains

Very true. And I wouldn't date either of them.

Well over the last few years I've had an 18 year old and one of my daughter's friends hit on me.

Both had huge brains, the 18 year old had a music collection I would die to have, tons of ideas, open minded, sort of climbed into bed with me one night. I snuggled. I gave her a massage, not my hot and bothered one, but she got hot and bothered because of the range of things I talked about and how I treated her.

But she was traveling and on her way to college. LDR my max might be 20km. But really if I can't walk there in an hour. And thanks I have owned a few hundred cars used to collect them. For a really totally hot (read brainy) bi (read bi) babe (read woman) I might get a bicycle. I might get really flexible and go as far as walk to bus bus and walk, but we are still sort if near 20km and this was like different continent.

And I explained I am just too much of a romantic. I was already in love with her, if we got to the rest of the stuff, it would be more than I wanted to go through

She actually admitted she had never imagined she could like someone with our age gap. For me I feel it is more over a certain age tends to comes with so many failed relationships, chances are I do not have enough closets for all the bags.

Under a certain age, I get lost in the new lingo. But then I am the kind if asshole who spells out every word in every text on an iPhone you know total douchebag about language.

I was stunned to meet this girl. Stunned. But she wants college and I want her to have college. I spent a few weeks just rolling around and feeling the gaga. Was so nice. Like a glass of cool water after a day in the desert.

Other girl was probably even more a fit. She loved my smell and hers (go read about pheromones if you don't already know) beautiful, body I loved very active, very brainy, very funny and quick mind. One of those totally social when social total cool sitting reading.

But this is a close friend of my daughter's. We did not get past dancing, hanging out, hand massage, I did not trust myself enough to carry it further than that.

"Maybe your daughter will be fine? Will get over it?"

You got no idea how much I both adore my daughter and fear her.

So I told her there were plenty of fish. She'd find one better.

I mean probably not I am totally swave. I mean I didn't get my swave at Walmart, I went to a Target. Now the deboner I'll admit kmart, but on the Martha Stewart aisle, so most people gotta wear sunglasses when they meet me.

Now when I demand the universe deliver, I do not fuck around. I mean in NYC, way too easy.

Let's go to rural India and live on a farm 2km from the bus stop. Only 100m of that is through mud, or 3km if you want dry feet.

Now am I hitting on some 20 year old at a meet up? This is going on the assumption you have a large enough guns, the handcuffs and guards to escort me there, No. If I am anywhere, screw meet ups, because really I think I'd date a total Barbie than go to one.

Hunting just seems to screw with the serendipity.
Have I put ads online? Oh yes. guilty.
I think I have met maybe three people since I took off, or my daughters more ripped off the No Dating seal a few years back. Mostly I get charming letters in Portuguese from people in Brazil or yak herders in Outer Mongolia let's call it more than 2000km.

I was really surprised when I read about Sony and got to talk to the people there, because I was doing some translation rewrite for them.
They went back over twenty years and looked at all the best things they'd done. Not one of them came from a graduate from a big name school. And yet they hired big names school people in disproportionate numbers.

I wonder what speed dating with blindfolds would be like.
 
Very true. And I wouldn't date either of them.

Ten years ago I would have said that age is just a number. I've been starting to see some benefit to age-defined groups.

Xicot's friend group is largely poly, young, and male. Mostly just-out-of-college young, bordering on a generation younger than Xicot and me. And those friends and I get on each other's nerves.

They haven't figured out yet that something that can be awesome and transformative for them can be tedious and painful for someone else, and it doesn't mean either of us is wrong-- it just means we're different.

And I have to bite my tongue not to say, "Yeah, when I was your age, I knew everything, too." The way they act is developmentally normal, but that doesn't keep me from finding it exhausting.

OTOH, I recently met a group of poly women (and mono women dating poly partners) in their 30s, 40s, and 50s, with fairly varied experiences and backgrounds. I find them delightfully easy to be around, because no one in the group assumes that we all like or want the same things. They also believe me when I say I am not looking for another partner, which is refreshing.

I think what I am noticing is not *exactly* an age thing, necessarily. It's a communication style thing. But in my observation, it correlates with age.

There's not really any nice way to say "I want more wise women, and fewer smug young men, in my life." But there it is.
 
When I got married (1987), I was 21; she was 45. And given the chance to go back in time, I'd do it again -- with even more appreciation, much more perspective, and no hesitation.

She has passed away and is sorely missed.
 
Awesome!

young, and male. Mostly just-out-of-college young,
t that something that can be awesome and transformative for them

And I have to bite my tongue not to say, "Yeah, when I was your age, I knew everything, too." The way they act is developmentally normal, but that doesn't keep me from finding it exhausting.


I think what I am noticing is not *exactly* an age thing, necessarily. It's a communication style thing. But in my observation, it correlates with age.

There's not really any nice way to say "I want more wise women, and fewer smug young men, in my life." But there it is.

Well, I would say I do have an "awesome" limit!

Do you take out your dentures, brush them on you sleeve whilst saying, "back in..." Lol

There is that funny something of the kid saying, "when I was 18, my father was such an asshole. By the time I reached 21, I was amazed at how much he'd matured."

Oh man, wow, that is soooo awesome!

Might come under deal breaker for me.
 
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