Hello lovely people!

LambChop

New member
Hi everyone!

I'm an American living in Italy, a foodie, a travel enthusiast and what I like to think of as a Vin Diesel style gamer: that is, a guy who passes as a meathead and a macho guy who really loves tabletop gaming and can get down with most every geeky past-time there is.

Like a lot of folks, I have spent my adult life as a serial monogamist, mostly for not knowing any better. I've spent time playfully single, juggling lovers who couldn't know about each other, but it wasn't until recently that I found myself in a relationship that challenged me to face my insecurities and fears with courage. I've fallen in love with a woman who has been in a long open relationship with another man for many years. The open detail of their relationship is what first piqued my interest, because unlike other open relationships I'd witnessed, theirs was rooted in profound love, rather than one party's selfishness and the other's compliance. Before opening the relationship, they had already determined that their connection was so deep and powerful that no sexual dalliance outside of it could possibly threaten it. When she and I met, she developed a crush that went a bit beyond the physical attraction she enjoyed with other partners, and renegotiated the rules with him to make sure that she could pursue me with his blessing. I don't think he anticipated that it would blossom from a crush to a full-blown love-soaked relationship, and I'm currently concerned that he feels threatened by our rather sudden dive into real feelings. I want him to know that I respect their relationship, and that I am not trying to replace him, but having never spoken to the man, I don't know how to accomplish that in an effective and meaningful way.

That being said, we each started this as monogamists of one variety or another, and now she is the focus of both our loves, while she comes to terms with the fact that she is apparently capable of polyamory.

I come to you, this community, humbly and openly, in the hopes that through your experiences and stories, I might learn how best to navigate untested waters. Please accept my thanks in advance.

<3
 
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Greetings LambChop,
Welcome to our forum. Please feel free to lurk, browse, etc.

I recommend our Life stories and blogs board to you, it introduces you to many of our experiences and stories. If you have any questions, you can ask them at General Poly Discussions or Poly Relationships Corner. We are a friendly bunch, so don't hesitate to post with your thoughts, questions, and concerns.

I'm glad you could join us.
Sincerely,
Kevin T., "official greeter" :)

Notes:

There's a *lot* of good info in Golden Nuggets. Have a look!

Please read through the guidelines if you haven't already.

Note: You needn't read every reply to your posts, especially if someone posts in a disagreeable way. Given the size and scope of the site it's hard not to run into the occasional disagreeable person. Please contact the mods if you do (or if you see any spam), and you can block the person if you want.

If you have any questions about the board itself, please private-message a mod and they'll do their best to help.

Welcome aboard!
 
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