3 Years in and needing a friend

Pubgirl

New member
Hey,

This isn't necessarily new to me, I have been in a relationship for 3 years now, its more poly guinea than polyamory. I entered into their marriage after knowing the couple fro 3 years. It was very natural for me and my male partner but myself and the wife butt heads all time.
We go through stages of friendship but never anything sexual. She blames me for taking her husband away but they had an agreement in the beginning as they spoke about this situation before I was involved.

The wife blames her current life on me but she does nothing to help herself in the relationship.

All I am looking for here is some support, a friendly voice, somewhere to vent and someone else's experiences.
 
Hi pubgirl. Welcome to the forum.

Sounds like even though "they had an agreement" at the beginning, she's not really on board with her partner having another partner.

So why do you hang in with this situation and not just bail out?
 
Hi Pubgirl - and welcome to the Forum! Sorry to hear of your unfortunate experience - but you came to the right place to talk about it. I noticed that you started a thread on the problem in the Poly Relationships Corners - and are already receiving some good input in return. Best of luck on the journey! Al
 
Greetings Pubgirl,
Welcome to our forum. Please feel free to lurk, browse, etc.

I looked at your other thread and responded there briefly. Basically, the good news is that you can do something about the situation. You can ask the wife to work things out with her husband. You can tell the husband to stop neglecting his wife. You do have the power to distance yourself from him if he refuses.

Sucks that they are dropping the problem in your lap, but if that's what they're going to do, at least you can be the first person to tackle the problem. Do it if they won't do it on their own.

Hopefully this and other posts will be helpful to you. Keep us posted if you're willing.
Sincerely,
Kevin T., "official greeter" :)

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Welcome aboard!
 
Hi Pubgirl and welcome to the forum!

I've heard in your post that you are not happy with your wife's perspective and actions. I'm not sure how much you can do to control that, though.

In terms of stuff you can control: What do you want out of the relationships? Are you getting it? And what can you do about the situation if you aren't?

Sentinel
 
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