starlight1
Active member
Annnnd I have had the worst trip back home ever lol. The trains were delayed which meant I didn't leave until around 130am! But it was alright, I spent from 12-1 talking to Rocky on phone good times, told him about the night out and the people I met.
I have in one night been on failed date with D, not going anywhere...nice person, no chemistry. And he's just not truly wired poly, he thinks he is because in the past he cheated, but he's not...cheating and poly are two very different things. I did pull out of walking him back to the station. He was trying to get me alone, and I felt really uncomfortable by his advances. Plus I was having a good time and he didn't ask me if I wanted to leave, he just said were going, like he had any right to. I wasn't as rude as him to call him out in front of people but I did privately and thankfully Irishcoffee had my back.
I also Got cornered by unicorn hunters...lol that was fun. When the man asked for my phone number I had to politely tell him I was more into His female partner than him.
And I also got asked out on a date by someone who I am actually interested in, we were making eye contact across the room all night and he kept coming to sit next to me. He's tall, handsome, very witty,..and again another scientist. I sure do like my scientists. I am beginning to see a pattern. He also looks startlingly similar to my high school crush and those type of combination of looks is really rare and super super super hot to me!!! he's about six foot two....yummy! I had to reach up so high to hug him and we are meeting up next week! Can't wait. He said the sweetest thing to me as we walked to the train station together. He said, "you know when you walk in a room and everyone is black and white, and then you see that one person in colour? That was you to me." Wow! I have never been told that before. I felt incredibly excited by his vibe, we just gelled so well! I know. I know I have said this before. But just because I am only with one person right now and haven't found the right second or third doesn't mean I am less poly. And I just genuinely get excited about people period. I think I would easily work in something where I got to know new people every day and helped fix their problems. Not one person over a really long time, but constant new stimulation. Something like that.
I also got to see irishcoffee and his metamours, I finally met some of them! They are really sweet and I got to see other people together and be happy and be ok with it, with someone I have emotional connection to. So that was a good test on the jealousy parameter for me. I was proud of myself.
Lily wasn't there unfortunately, and that is ok. I hope she is alright.
I got a message from Leo too today saying he couldn't make the group meeting. Oh well. I am leaving my reply until tomorrow. I know he likes me, but clearly he has issues around dating me and that's cool. But I am still hurt and I hate not having a voice and he made the decision so suddenly after originally agreeing and voicing the opinion he really cared a great deal about me already and wanted to have sex??? So I have to accept it is what it is and it may pick up again later at some point or may not. I am not sure if I want to get hurt or let down again with Leo when he disregards my phone calls texts etc based on fear of unknown. I am always going to do the unknow, so communication styles not working there... and I am not upset about his decision to not date me just hurt by the mixed signals and when I tried to voice my opinion he went down the road of saying I was trying to change his mind. In actuality it was a logistical problem and I was just trying to help find a practical solution. Oh well. If he is not interested in two way solution based conversation that doesn't bode well for any relationship regardless poly or not. Even Friends have to create a schedule and meet each other half way.
I have in one night been on failed date with D, not going anywhere...nice person, no chemistry. And he's just not truly wired poly, he thinks he is because in the past he cheated, but he's not...cheating and poly are two very different things. I did pull out of walking him back to the station. He was trying to get me alone, and I felt really uncomfortable by his advances. Plus I was having a good time and he didn't ask me if I wanted to leave, he just said were going, like he had any right to. I wasn't as rude as him to call him out in front of people but I did privately and thankfully Irishcoffee had my back.
I also Got cornered by unicorn hunters...lol that was fun. When the man asked for my phone number I had to politely tell him I was more into His female partner than him.
And I also got asked out on a date by someone who I am actually interested in, we were making eye contact across the room all night and he kept coming to sit next to me. He's tall, handsome, very witty,..and again another scientist. I sure do like my scientists. I am beginning to see a pattern. He also looks startlingly similar to my high school crush and those type of combination of looks is really rare and super super super hot to me!!! he's about six foot two....yummy! I had to reach up so high to hug him and we are meeting up next week! Can't wait. He said the sweetest thing to me as we walked to the train station together. He said, "you know when you walk in a room and everyone is black and white, and then you see that one person in colour? That was you to me." Wow! I have never been told that before. I felt incredibly excited by his vibe, we just gelled so well! I know. I know I have said this before. But just because I am only with one person right now and haven't found the right second or third doesn't mean I am less poly. And I just genuinely get excited about people period. I think I would easily work in something where I got to know new people every day and helped fix their problems. Not one person over a really long time, but constant new stimulation. Something like that.
I also got to see irishcoffee and his metamours, I finally met some of them! They are really sweet and I got to see other people together and be happy and be ok with it, with someone I have emotional connection to. So that was a good test on the jealousy parameter for me. I was proud of myself.
Lily wasn't there unfortunately, and that is ok. I hope she is alright.
I got a message from Leo too today saying he couldn't make the group meeting. Oh well. I am leaving my reply until tomorrow. I know he likes me, but clearly he has issues around dating me and that's cool. But I am still hurt and I hate not having a voice and he made the decision so suddenly after originally agreeing and voicing the opinion he really cared a great deal about me already and wanted to have sex??? So I have to accept it is what it is and it may pick up again later at some point or may not. I am not sure if I want to get hurt or let down again with Leo when he disregards my phone calls texts etc based on fear of unknown. I am always going to do the unknow, so communication styles not working there... and I am not upset about his decision to not date me just hurt by the mixed signals and when I tried to voice my opinion he went down the road of saying I was trying to change his mind. In actuality it was a logistical problem and I was just trying to help find a practical solution. Oh well. If he is not interested in two way solution based conversation that doesn't bode well for any relationship regardless poly or not. Even Friends have to create a schedule and meet each other half way.
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