CheshireCat
New member
What an interesting read this thread is. My husband has recently confided that he's having trouble enjoying sex with me recently (partner of over 10 years). He's placing quite a lot of significance on the lack of enjoyment, at least in part because he's not getting the same issue with his new girlfriend - this is relevant because he's had some health issues in general that have made sex painful for him.No. Why would I direct away from it?
And if you know YOU direct your energies toward your primary -- why all this worry about what other people are doing? What needs validating or affirming for you? What are you afraid you are missing out on?
No, I don't worry about not being a shiny new toy to him any more. I like being OLD shiny toy better.
There isn't as much "weather reporting" because he knows me and all my tells already. It's a smoother ride, it's a more intense ride, it's a longer ride.
You can get some nice chords and phrases sometimes with a new partner. And learning to make beautiful music together is a fun process of discovery.
But oh, with an old lover? That knows you well? You can run through flawless symphonies! It's another kind of rush.
GG
I can't help thinking that this must at least in part be linked to both his NRE with his new girlfriend (of 3 months) *and* the fact he's exploring kink with her in a way I've never really wanted to... and he really likes it. Mostly I'm terrified that we've broken something irretrievably but I'm also hoping fervently we can fix it.
I love your quote GG, that's rather what I was hoping would be the case for us, but alas at the moment it doesn't seem to be that way. Fretting ain't gonna help me relax, either. ARGH.
I hope you've managed to find a way through your questions, lolalondon!