sparklepop
New member
Hi guys,
I went on a date last night with a girl who told me that she has HPV1. I have to confess that I am not overly knowledgable about it and so, whilst doing my own research online, I wanted to come and ask for personal experiences and viewpoints of people here.
I'm very cautious about STIs, especially because I have a primary partner and want to consider her health as well as my own. I have only slept with two other women during our two year relationship and saw their most recent test results before sleeping with them.
The girl I went on a date with has quite a colourful past and present. She used to be a stripper, a member of a Harem, she told me that she used to make out with her sister and masturbate in the same room as her when they were teenagers, she has a husband and other partners and attends orgies where she says she sleeps with people the second time she's met them.
So aside from the HPV situation, there is the promiscuity issue. Of course, I know that some people who sleep around are even more strict about getting tested than some who hardly have any partners. The problem is that I have always had long-term mostly monogamous relationships in the past - I've only slept with 7 people at the age of 28 and I'm definitely not ashamed of that fact! But this can make me squeamish and judgmental about those who are less... fussy as fuck?
I'm trying to make a judgement call without being judgmental, which I don't feel is fair on her. I spoke to my GF about it this morning and she was very tense about the conversation. She reminded me that she met a guy last year who she cut the cord with immediately because he had the Herpes virus. However, she did also date a guy more recently who admitted he slept with other casual partners without protection. She always used a condom with him, but didn't barrier herself when he performed oral sex on her. We both felt uneasy about his practices with other women, but didn't really know where to draw the line.
Do you have a guideline about certain viruses? How do you approach safe sex in your relationship? Where do you think the balance lies between being responsible without being over-cautious?
Just to add - please, please, please don't mistake my post to mean that I feel you are promiscuous if you have HPV, or any other virus. Or that I am saying promiscuity is bad. i'm here because promiscuity makes me concerned for my health and i *don't* want to be judgmental. It is difficult to ask this question without negative connotations being taken. The promiscuity and STI issues I'm trying to raise are two separate things.
I went on a date last night with a girl who told me that she has HPV1. I have to confess that I am not overly knowledgable about it and so, whilst doing my own research online, I wanted to come and ask for personal experiences and viewpoints of people here.
I'm very cautious about STIs, especially because I have a primary partner and want to consider her health as well as my own. I have only slept with two other women during our two year relationship and saw their most recent test results before sleeping with them.
The girl I went on a date with has quite a colourful past and present. She used to be a stripper, a member of a Harem, she told me that she used to make out with her sister and masturbate in the same room as her when they were teenagers, she has a husband and other partners and attends orgies where she says she sleeps with people the second time she's met them.
So aside from the HPV situation, there is the promiscuity issue. Of course, I know that some people who sleep around are even more strict about getting tested than some who hardly have any partners. The problem is that I have always had long-term mostly monogamous relationships in the past - I've only slept with 7 people at the age of 28 and I'm definitely not ashamed of that fact! But this can make me squeamish and judgmental about those who are less... fussy as fuck?
I'm trying to make a judgement call without being judgmental, which I don't feel is fair on her. I spoke to my GF about it this morning and she was very tense about the conversation. She reminded me that she met a guy last year who she cut the cord with immediately because he had the Herpes virus. However, she did also date a guy more recently who admitted he slept with other casual partners without protection. She always used a condom with him, but didn't barrier herself when he performed oral sex on her. We both felt uneasy about his practices with other women, but didn't really know where to draw the line.
Do you have a guideline about certain viruses? How do you approach safe sex in your relationship? Where do you think the balance lies between being responsible without being over-cautious?
Just to add - please, please, please don't mistake my post to mean that I feel you are promiscuous if you have HPV, or any other virus. Or that I am saying promiscuity is bad. i'm here because promiscuity makes me concerned for my health and i *don't* want to be judgmental. It is difficult to ask this question without negative connotations being taken. The promiscuity and STI issues I'm trying to raise are two separate things.
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