BonzaiBlitz
New member
So Bloom has been dating Techie for about five months.
He's also dating Windy.
About two months ago, he went from having a full-time job and a nice house to being unemployed and homeless, almost overnight.
Since then, Bloom and I have let him stay over on frequent occasion (no big deal), and he recently became employed again, but his lack of a stable residence has created an overhanging stress on his and Bloom's relationship.
Which would be manageable, but Bloom is under almost daily stress from her job.
There has been some deception recently, and Techie and Bloom's attempts to work it out has just left her feeling exponentially more inadequate and insignificant every time they talk.
To the point that last night, she hurt herself with a pair of scissors, just to try to replace the pain she can't control with one she can.
I've tried very hard to just let their relationship be itself, especially since my relationship with Windy has really taken flight.
I hate the idea/practice of "I'm the primary so I have final say on your other relationships".
...but Bloom's self-harm has really rattled me.
Windy and I have agreed that Bloom and Techie NEED to break up, if only so that Bloom can come back into herself emotionally and be able to function, and then make a decision regarding their relationship.
But while she agrees, she seems unable to convey it to him in a way he will accept.
Bloom and I never talked about "veto power" before, and I'd rather not try to force it now.
Does this situation just come down to Bloom pushing through to get the distance she needs, or am I missing some other option?
He's also dating Windy.
About two months ago, he went from having a full-time job and a nice house to being unemployed and homeless, almost overnight.
Since then, Bloom and I have let him stay over on frequent occasion (no big deal), and he recently became employed again, but his lack of a stable residence has created an overhanging stress on his and Bloom's relationship.
Which would be manageable, but Bloom is under almost daily stress from her job.
There has been some deception recently, and Techie and Bloom's attempts to work it out has just left her feeling exponentially more inadequate and insignificant every time they talk.
To the point that last night, she hurt herself with a pair of scissors, just to try to replace the pain she can't control with one she can.
I've tried very hard to just let their relationship be itself, especially since my relationship with Windy has really taken flight.
I hate the idea/practice of "I'm the primary so I have final say on your other relationships".
...but Bloom's self-harm has really rattled me.
Windy and I have agreed that Bloom and Techie NEED to break up, if only so that Bloom can come back into herself emotionally and be able to function, and then make a decision regarding their relationship.
But while she agrees, she seems unable to convey it to him in a way he will accept.
Bloom and I never talked about "veto power" before, and I'd rather not try to force it now.
Does this situation just come down to Bloom pushing through to get the distance she needs, or am I missing some other option?