Hello September Rain.
I think it's awesome that you are talking about this openly.
On the one hand, I agree with all the people who say that ED isn't a big deal. That's probably the best attitude to take anyway, since it IS what is happening, and putting more pressure on yourself is not going to help anything. And for sure there's lots of creative fun things to do in bed without a penis.
BUT... I also want to acknowledge that ED can be a really painful, even shameful reality for a lot of men. It can make you feel like less of a man (you're not), it can cut you to the core of who you are. Whatever feelings you are having about this are natural and I think it's okay to frame it as a problem to be solved.
My first thought is: did you suffer any childhood trauma (you don't have to answer that), and do you now endure chronic stress?
Sex drive CAN be a psychological issue, but it's extremely likely there's an underlying physical cause. The reason I asked about trauma and stress is that if your body is in chronic fight or flight mode, that can seriously reduce your sex drive.
This is for a few reasons. One is that when you are stressed, your body shuts down functions that aren't essential for fighting or fleeing (like digestion and reproduction) in order to divert resources to energizing your limbs, focusing your attention, etc. (This may also contribute to not being in the mood for love. It's hard to feel sexy when your body and mind are in stress mode.) If your guts are under-performing due to stress, you might have poor nutrient absorption. Which means that your body has less ingredients to make sex hormones. So you could be starting with a lowered supply due to malabsorption in the gut.
In fact I would say that you almost certainly have a candida albicans problem and a leaky gut. Which means a lot of the foods you are eating may be feeding the candida instead of yourself. The keto diet should help with that, but you might need a more targeted dietary regimen that includes anti-fungals (and/or anti-microbials depending on what is happening in your guts). If you can afford it, I would highly recommend seeing a naturopathic doctor.
Another reason that chronic stress can reduce sex drive is that sex hormones are made up of many of the same ingredients as stress hormones. Your body will steal sex-drive ingredients (mainly derived from meat) to make cortisol, ie. So whatever your body IS deriving from your food gets diverted to making stress hormones instead of sex hormones.
Your body has been wonderfully designed by natural selection to prioritize survival over reproduction. (And outside the context of civilization, nobody ever had to deal with long-term, chronic stressors that never go away like jobs and traffic noise and the constant threat that someone could take your home and food away if the capitalist system - which doesn't care about you - randomly decides that this is the most economically efficient choice.) So the end result of chronic stress can be a chronically reduced sex drive.
Fix the stress, to the degree you are able. Get out into nature more. That's the environment our bodies evolved in, and it makes us feel happy and calm to be there instead of in the unnatural, stress-provoking cities so many of us now inhabit.
What is your sleep like?
Humans are diurnal animals, meaning we are supposed to get tired and go to sleep once the sun goes down, and wake up when it rises. Our bodies are naturally sync'd to this rhythm, and that includes hormone production. If you are awake when you should be asleep, your body will produce less of what you need, including precursors for sex hormones.
ED is usually a blood-flow problem. Positions can help, but generally the blood-flow problem is a heart issue. Which is why I was very glad to hear you've gone keto. That should clear up the heart condition eventually.
I have many friends who have gone keto. Every single one of them has had mind-blowing positive results - so stick with it! It might feel worse for a while as your body releases all the toxins that it has been storing up over the years, but it gets better and easier as time goes on.
I've been eating a basically Paleo (similar to keto) diet for 3 years and I love it. The first six weeks are the hardest, in my experience. I stopped getting food cravings completely after about six months.
Diet is probably not enough, though. Exercise (gotta get that heart rate up for 30 minutes 3x a week) is critical. Good sleep habits. And a daily meditation or yoga practice to help your body and mind learn to deal with stress more effectively. Meditation feels useless for the first several months that you do it, but then the rewards start pouring in.
Good luck! I think you're on the right track.
A