last year hubby went to new years party w gf. this year they are going to bnb fri & sat night only a few miles away, just the 2 of them. i am having difficulties. i have been upset all week. had big fight mon night. warm-cold-warm-cold all week. i am exhausted trying to keep my feelings in check. has had gf for about 2 years.
yes, treat it like any other stay-over weekend. why should this one be any different? but this weekend is different. it's new year's!
a] i thought having sunday activity for the 2 of us would help. it has. anticipation.
b] i also asked for something i could do for him while he is gone. helping me feel connected. i just found out tonight no, he has nothing prepared for me to do while he is gone. but i've been mentioning it all week!!!
c] he said in 32 yrs of our marrriage i never expressed doing anything special for new years. WHAT??? neither did he!!! so when gf said how about? he said sure, why not. i don't want to stop them cause then he'll resent me & be surly.
so how do i cope? he is coming back, i know. he has stay-overs about once a month. for his birthday they were gone thurs-mon.
i have no friends nor family to call. not really a party gal. i have low low libido [asexual]. his gf has high & so does he. i can't compete.
he doesn't like to talk "feelings."
coping ideas welcome, for this weekend or other stay-overs.
i'll just drink more wine tonight so maybe i can sleep. i'm hurt & i'm angry. i won't be abandoned, but i can't compete. i need help coping...
yes, treat it like any other stay-over weekend. why should this one be any different? but this weekend is different. it's new year's!
a] i thought having sunday activity for the 2 of us would help. it has. anticipation.
b] i also asked for something i could do for him while he is gone. helping me feel connected. i just found out tonight no, he has nothing prepared for me to do while he is gone. but i've been mentioning it all week!!!
c] he said in 32 yrs of our marrriage i never expressed doing anything special for new years. WHAT??? neither did he!!! so when gf said how about? he said sure, why not. i don't want to stop them cause then he'll resent me & be surly.
so how do i cope? he is coming back, i know. he has stay-overs about once a month. for his birthday they were gone thurs-mon.
i have no friends nor family to call. not really a party gal. i have low low libido [asexual]. his gf has high & so does he. i can't compete.
he doesn't like to talk "feelings."
coping ideas welcome, for this weekend or other stay-overs.
i'll just drink more wine tonight so maybe i can sleep. i'm hurt & i'm angry. i won't be abandoned, but i can't compete. i need help coping...