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  #21  
Old 06-14-2011, 10:19 AM
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Magdlyn Magdlyn is offline
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The second link seems to prove my point anyway, to an extent (as it only addresses 30-somethings and not people in their 40s or older):

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As far as men go, once a guy gets to be in his thirties, he’s simply not the machine he once was. His erections are less, shall we say, erect, they are fewer than they might once have been, and his repeat performances are not what they once were. But, as with a woman in her thirties, this doesn’t mean a man doesn’t enjoy sex all the same. He just might have a hard time keeping pace with his girlfriend of the same age, who, after years of practice, has finally figured out what all the fuss is about.
However, anecdotally, in the last few years of my marriage, my sex drive was so high (late 40s, early 50s) my ex and I were having sex daily. Just before we broke up, one day we had so much sex, he came 5 times in 24 hours, a new record for him in 30 years. Age 55! He was having such a banquet of sex, when our kids got older and my fertility decreased, bringing my testosterone forward and increasing my desire.

Also, this article talks of "sex hormones," without defining which ones she is talking about. I mentioned the role of testosterone in women's sex drive, not just her estrogen/progesterone firings. When there is talk of women sexually peaking around 35, that leaves out all the horny babes in peri-menopause and beyond. Once periods stop, you do away with pregnancy risk, and monthly varying desire, PMS, bloating, bleeding, and cramps. Makes a big difference in one's desire for sex, at least in my case.
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Last edited by Magdlyn; 06-14-2011 at 10:23 AM.
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  #22  
Old 06-14-2011, 10:29 AM
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Mono refuses to read Sex at Dawn, which also goes into great detail about how people are not biologically monogamous. Men are good for a shot or 2, women have the potential to be mega-orgasmic, and in hunter gatherer societies, are open to having several partners pleasure her during one sex session. The first guy just warms her up.
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Love withers under constraint; its very essence is liberty. It is compatible neither with envy, jealousy or fear. It is there most pure, perfect and unlimited when its votaries live in confidence, equality and unreserve. -- Shelley

me: Mags, 59, living with:
miss pixi, 37
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  #23  
Old 06-14-2011, 10:34 AM
transitapparent transitapparent is offline
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my record was 9 in 24 hours when I was in my early 20's. I'm not so sure I can do that anymore. I'm always up for 2nds. if and when that happens, she's never up for 3rds. I still ask though.
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Old 06-14-2011, 10:36 AM
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my record was 9 in 24 hours when I was in my early 20's. I'm not so sure I can do that anymore. I'm always up for 2nds. if and when that happens, she's never up for 3rds. I still ask though.
How old are you?
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Love withers under constraint; its very essence is liberty. It is compatible neither with envy, jealousy or fear. It is there most pure, perfect and unlimited when its votaries live in confidence, equality and unreserve. -- Shelley

me: Mags, 59, living with:
miss pixi, 37
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  #25  
Old 06-14-2011, 02:33 PM
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Any partner I`ve been with, has been able to go more then 3 times in a night, (sometimes, much more.) and I`m pretty sure I`m not selecting them out of some mystery isle at the grocery store.

This is why I don`t read all these quacky books. I`m sure as general rules of thumb, these books are just ducky, but I feel I`d be missing out if I went into things preconceived, with 'what the book told me' expectations.

It would be a pity, if we had sex once, and I thought; ' Oh well, he`s probably done" and left it at that.
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Old 06-14-2011, 02:42 PM
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Lol so interesting to read all these "records" for guys. And it's really really sad to me for my own relationship be use my guy's record was WAY higher. (not to brag, but he more than doubled the highest record in here. And i verified it.) so why the sudden utter lack?

And for my clients, why the lack to begin with?
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Old 06-14-2011, 02:57 PM
GroundedSpirit GroundedSpirit is offline
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Hey Erosa,

I think it's important to stay connected to the fact that our personal views/experience is exactly that - personal. Unless we intentionally find ways to make the base a lot wider/more encompassing.

I suspect your experience is quite narrow and has a built in amount of 'cultural' bias. That make sense ?

I hope this doesn't come off sounding wrong, but you are obviously dealing with a SUBSET (and a cultural one) of the general population. In particular, a subset who grants 'psychic' phenomena enough credibility to pay money for further investigation. It's an interesting phenomenon you've noted and I don't question the possible validity of the observation within that particular subset. Actually find it intriguing.

But we have to be careful about thinking that a particular observation either confirms or refutes a "general rule" that applies for larger percentages of a population.

GS
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  #28  
Old 06-14-2011, 02:59 PM
NeonKaos NeonKaos is offline
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I hate to be the one to spew the most obvious cliché, but there is far too much emphasis placed on the orgasm. "Able to come more than once, able to come at least this many times in such-and-such a time period..." Please people!

I tend to rapidly lose interest and tire easily after I orgasm. The faster I orgasm, the more quickly I lose "the zone". Sometimes this is a good thing, like if we have to go somewhere soon. Also, sometimes it's good if the guy ejaculates somewhat prior to the sex act, then he can focus on other things besides his impending orgasm.

Of course, these points have very little to do with whether or not someone wants sex in the first place.
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  #29  
Old 06-14-2011, 03:46 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by nycindie View Post
With all due respect, those articles are not sources I would trust for "scientific research." I would refer to a peer-reviewed scientific or medical journal for scientific research, not two bloggers and Women's Health magazine which is a not-so-great fluff publication.
Sorry, I mistook articles based on the research of Dr. Lee P. Shulman, professor of obstetrics and gynecology at Northwestern University’s Feinberg School of Medicine, to be pretty scientific. I'm not the only one who doesn't read it seems
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  #30  
Old 06-14-2011, 06:06 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by NeonKaos View Post
I hate to be the one to spew the most obvious cliché, but there is far too much emphasis placed on the orgasm. "Able to come more than once, able to come at least this many times in such-and-such a time period..." Please people!

I tend to rapidly lose interest and tire easily after I orgasm. The faster I orgasm, the more quickly I lose "the zone". Sometimes this is a good thing, like if we have to go somewhere soon. Also, sometimes it's good if the guy ejaculates somewhat prior to the sex act, then he can focus on other things besides his impending orgasm.

Of course, these points have very little to do with whether or not someone wants sex in the first place.
This is an excellent point - there is definitely a difference between number of ejaculations and drive. I've been through periods of time where I've been less interested in sex, and I do need to feel "in the mood". If I'm covered in grease, working on my motorcycle, and frustrated by a problem I can't seem to solve, I'm not going to leap at the possibility, because I'll be stressed out. Once I solve that problem and wash my hands, then I'll feel all sexy and manly and want to boink.

...and as for personal records, mine was 13, I was 18 at the time. More recently, I've managed 8 or 9. I don't enjoy these marathon ejaculation sessions all that much though, I need breaks inbetween, and after the first four or so in a 12 hour period, it just isn't quite as functional, and doesn't feel quite as good. At some point I'm thinking "damn woman, you need a vibrator".

....and speaking of vibrators, an interesting anecdotal aside somewhat relevant to this story is that most men are excellent masturbators (whether we admit it or not). I've known some women who are good at it, but they seem to be far fewer than men. My wife, for example, has repeatedly expressed frustration at how difficult it is to bring a woman (specifically herself) to orgasm. This may be contributing to the lack of male sexual frustration the OP has mentioned. Another potential factor is, I have my doubts about highly satisfied women seeking the consultation of psychics, or really anyone.

Mono - I definitely recommend reading "Sex at Dawn" - while it gives an excellent overview of the evolution of human sexuality, and debunks many of the preconceptions regarding monogamy in humans, it never says you "have" to be poly, or anything like that. It merely suggests we make less of a big deal out of infidelity and our sexuality in general. In fact, it overviews the incredible adaptability of certain parts of male DNA and anatomy to deal with varying situations, and suggests we are adapting physically to our cultural choice of monogamy. I know you're Mono, but reading this book can only enhance your understanding of those you love, even if it brings you little insight into yourself (which I wouldn't entirely rule-out - we are very complex animals, after all).
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