Recent content by anon4now

It has been a while but thought I'd update anyone that might be following this. I have already decided that I will never cheat on my wife again. I have also decided that I am never going to come out to her either. I have done alot of soul searching, reading of various books, AND had some...

Communicate, communicate, communicate... That is my new mantra.

Just a quick update: I have stood by my resolve to not communicate with M. It's killing a part of me and it's very hard to pretend I don't have this pain while working with my wife on our issues. I catch myself wondering if she is feeling the same and then I want to comfort her. Then I...

It started with my blog here and I thankfully had some people help me. Through all of their help and reading other's posts and the responses to them, I am doing so much better as an individual. I'm not done growing yet and I have alot of ground to cover to get where I need to be. I plan on...

Show them this post. It is very thoughtful and clear to me what your needs are in all of this. Just make sure you are open to their needs, as well, within reason. This is part of the dynamics of polyamorous relationships I will have to understand better myself before I bring polyamory up with...

Work on the marriage in counseling (possibly bring up the term there). Once it is solid again, then you can bring polyamory up if it is something you really want to delve into discussing with her. sounds like she's not Poly and just made a mistake. The other thing... You mentioned you are...

ARGH!!! I typed up a very well stated reply and hit the wrong button... Now I am going to wonder if I covered all my bases.... First and foremost, you have to tell her how you feel about having an open marriage. It doesn't matter if it upsets her or not. You are upset that she's had this...

I might be speaking out of place but I'm gonna say it anyway... The 2 couples have been swinging for 2 years and "exclusive" for 2 months. Has it not occured to you to simply state "Whenever we bring up Polyamory, you guys seem very uncomfortable. Is that because we are putting too much...

Thanks for the kind words... and the mod comment was just a joke. I don't follow "Drama" on any boards. :D

I don't know if I'm doing it right by posting here in my original one (Blog style) but here's my latest update... I am too weak to have M as close friend and not want/try for more. Today, we made it official that we are going to stop communicating. We have created a reason as to why we aren't...

Time flies... Another rambling installment of "The inner workings of A4N" Did more soul searching... discovered an issue that exists which was glossed over and ignored. As I stated in my first entry, my wife and I used to be HYPERsexual. You name it, there was a time when we did it (Go...

I fully agree with what you state... that's why I have to figure out the why and deal with that. I don't want to be jealous when I know how wonderful and OK my love for M is. that's why I'm going to have to do more soul searching... Thank you for your reply though. It helps me to know I'm on...

Edit: maybe I should read all 3 pages before I post. Even though it might not be helpful, I don't think it will hurt to leave it up. Let me start with the fact that I am new to polyamory. I am dealing with almost the same thing as you and your wife, but I am the one who had an affair. I can...

VERY HELPFUL!!! Thank you. :: hugs :: I am still learning about my "wiring" and hope that through more soul searching, I will will grow to understand myself better and to stop trying to beat myself up for not having the "norm" feelings of monogomy. The other aspect I forgot to comment on was...

Don't know if there is any interest... Just because I began here, I thought there might be some interested to hear how things are going. If not, no worries. I took alot of alone time to think about what I was doing/contemplating. I know that what I've done is cheating and not a healthy...