Recent content by FindingMyselfInTheGrey

We try to keep things as equal as possible. We do take into account, special events (birthdays or anniversaries) and job requirements. GF travels a lot for work. Hubbs goes back and forth between her house and mine. If she's going to be traveling he spends extra time with her before she leaves...

This 3-up/3-down is the general rule of followed by the US armed forces. But really in the Navy they have 4 rank groups: 'Blue Shirts' (which is further broken into 2 groups: Airmen/Firemen/Seaman (E1-E3), and Petty Officers (E4-E6), 'Khaki' (E7-E9), 'Warrant' (all CWOs), and 'Officers' (all...

Short answer: The military can't punish your husband for your relationship with your boyfriend. The UCMJ only applies to the active duty member... in some overseas locations there may be additional rules that you will have to follow as a spouse: such as curfews or dress codes. Your spouse on...

I don't have any big picture statistics, but my stats are: We are not really a triad but a V: F-M-F, with me and Hubs being together for 14 + years. He and his gf just celebrated their one-year anniversary last month. We are an 'accidental' V: Hubs and I divorced for 6 months. He and she...

Funny I just spoke with someone about how sexuals vs asexuals view sex. For most sexuals sex is like pizza-even when it's bad, it's good. For some asexuals it's more like...I'll eat the pizza, but mostly just to make the bringer of the pizza happy. There may be parts of the pizza that is...

Yup. Another Gray-Ace here (although in my own head I use the term Grace, because it's pretty). I also suggest going to the Asexual Visibility and Education Network http://www.asexuality.org/en/ They have a forum as well and a ton of reference material to read through. When I finally figured...

We are in a closed FMF V, with my Hubby as the hinge. Hubby and I have been married for 13 years GF has been with hubby for 1 year. GF and I have been slowly building a friendship for 3 months. We try to have dinner together once a month as a chance to visit and figure out our group calendar.

My 2 cents as a noob... The way I see it you have three options: 1. End the relationships entirely, no friendships, romances, or acquaintances with either of them. -But this is not something you seem to desire as you care for both persons and want to be with them. 2. Carry on as you have been...

I like the idea of starting a new thread for the new season though... just to assist with clarity. I haven't seen the season premier yet as Hubbs is at his other house and it's a show we watch together, but I understand that the quad is back and there's a new triad or V. I'm kinda bummed that...

I suppose I should have clarified for my group, and for right now, our rule #1 is to move as slowly as the most reserved person in the group. Other rules that occasionally become #1: 1. Openness and honesty- Not only with others in the group but also within each individual. 1. Clarity in...

Sounds like our metamour relationships are in the same stage This is a question that I have been struggling with as well. I am in a closed V with my husband as the hinge. My hubs and I have been together for 14 years and he has been with my metamour for 9 months. She and I are very aware of...

First, let me say that I am relatively new to polyamory, as we have only recently opened our relationship. So for what it’s worth, here's my opinion: This is my first area of concern. The basic premise of polyamory (as I understand it) is to be honest with all partners, and to move at the pace...

Sorry if I made you feel at fault, which you wern't. I have another member whom has repeatedly challenged things I say...which is what is frusterating. Your questions have been for clarification purposes not for belittlement or challenge. I have enjoyed your questions as they have given me...

Funny, I came to this site looking for support and advice as Hubby and I entered into a poly relationship. What I found was judgment and a serious lack of general kindness. I am incredibly frustrated by this feeling of having to constantly justify the terms that Hubby and I have chosen to...

Not to split hairs but having the two terms as synonyms is akin to calling every heavy drinker an alcoholic (i.e. addicted to alcohol). The key difference between being a heavy consumer of alcohol, food, sex or anything else and being an addict is that (as you say) an addiction is a behavior...