I just looked at your picture about the role of privilige, and I think where my husband and i are are stuck between him wanting a harem (or at least one other girl) and complete permission for both of us. He has not stopped me from being with numerous other men, even though I find that i think i am doing so as a distraction from what he wants and is doing, and looking for a backup in case we fall apart. how do we handle all these emotions and gain a balance? i think we want to stay together, i mean 12 years is a long time and I for one have a fear of the unknown if we do break up. i don't think i will find someone i am so comfortable with or that would put up with me the way he does. i am just so scared and confused. any support and insight would be appreciated.