New Poly Peeps

consciousspirit

New member
I would love to connect with other poly people for friendship. My interests are self-love, personal growth, spiritual awakening and expansion, transformation. Also, love to chat about how poly has opened you up spiritually- if anyone is experiencing that type of thing.

About me: Female, married, poly (no current partners outside of primary)
I am experiencing a pretty deep expansion right now, lots of personal transformation- for the past year in particular. Opening up to my truth- that poly is what makes sense for me- has created a new opening in my consciousness. My third eye and crown have opened more as well. I feel less held back by life and its experiences- if that makes sense.

Anyway, reach out and chat, if you also have similar things you'd like to talk about. :)
 
Last edited:
I do not consider my self to be a spiritual person, more of a practical philospher. :sneaky:

I am drawn to concepts of mindfullness, mind-body awareness (such as yoga), living a life of intention and authenticity, voluntary simplicity. Writings on secular buddhism often strike a chord. Currently we (first me and now my husband as well) are on a journey of decluttering - our possessions, but also our schedules and lives. So that we can create the time and space to explore ourselves - alone and together - and focus on the things we find meaningful and important.

JaneQ
 
living a life of intention and authenticity, voluntary simplicity...are on a journey of decluttering - our possessions, but also our schedules and lives. So that we can create the time and space to explore ourselves - alone and together - and focus on the things we find meaningful and important.
Hi JaneQ,

That sounds really delicious- the idea of decluttering your life so that you can focus on what you want. I can imagine that feels really good and balancing. I think I am doing that as well but hadn't really framed it that way to myself. I am taking stock of what is working, what isn't working and discovering what I want and need. As time goes on, we change. I am trying to reevaluate what is important to me, now.

Also, your post has me rethinking how I worded what I was looking for in connecting. I am highly interested in personal growth in all its forms as well. Feel free to chat any time :)

~CS
 
... the idea of decluttering your life so that you can focus on what you want. I can imagine that feels really good and balancing...
It does!

Making the conscious decision to only agree to do things, take responsibility for things, participate in things that you have chosen for yourself - is incredibly liberating. It is useful to recognize that if "no" isn't an acceptable answer, then the person wasn't actually asking you a question - they were giving you an order (I don't respond well to people telling me what to do).

It's also incredibly liberating to really consider why we may (or may not) want to do the things that you are "supposed to" (i.e. should) do.

For instance, apparently I am supposed to want to keep my lawn mowed. I don't - I don't care if it is mowed. It is a waste of time, effort, money, fuel, and is bad for the environment. So the only reason I mowed my lawn in town was because it pissed of my neighbors when I didn't (and the township would try to fine me $300 if it was longer than 6 inches). I moved to the country and own 20+ acres, a lot of it wooded and the rest? I don't mow. I live in a field surrounded by woods. My neighbor, who is in his 80s and owns twice as much land as I do, keeps several acres around the house mowed to golf course quality. I ran into his wife the other day while I was getting my mail - we talked about this and that and the subject came up. "My husband says that maybe you have the right idea, " she tells me. "He hates mowing the lawn." How much time has this poor man wasted over the decades doing this activity that he hates?!?!? It's not to keep the neighbors happy - there is me, who doesn't care, and the guy across the street that lives in a trailer and uses his 60 acres to MAKE HAY!!! (literally "mowing" twice a year!)

(Now, if you want a lawn and hate mowing - that's an excellent time to hire someone else to do it. That is, literally, the only type of happiness that money CAN buy. https://www.latimes.com/science/sciencenow/la-sci-sn-money-time-happiness-20170724-story.html )

Just some food for thought...

Jane("no-lawn-having:)Q

PS. I really like the Wookiefoot song "Don't should on me" lyrics:
Don’t you should on me and i won’t drop my shoulds on you
also
When you should on your friends it’s bad for the health
But you got to be careful not to should on yourself
 
if "no" isn't an acceptable answer, then the person wasn't actually asking you a question - they were giving you an order
This whole post made me smile, but this little gem in particular.... ooo, I got shivers. I never looked at it that way before. How often do we do things because we are conditioned to say yes or because we feel the guilt pulling us into doing what we don't want to. I've taken this to heart and will do some thinking about my own life and how it applies.

I like how you are changing the paradigm by not mowing your property. You've got your neighbor wondering why he's spending so much time on his mower. lol.
How nice that you moved to a space that made more sense for you and how you want to live. I've been considering moving to a property in a more rural area for awhile. The HOA fees for maintenance that I don't actually care about, the noise pollution that it brings as they trim trees and then use blowers for the debris. I've been looking at the idea of building my own place on the land of my choosing for the exact reasons that you are mentioning- because it is more important for my well-being to spend on what I actually want, what will bring me more satisfaction.

(Now, if you want a lawn and hate mowing - that's an excellent time to hire someone else to do it. That is, literally, the only type of happiness that money CAN buy. https://www.latimes.com/science/sciencenow/la-sci-sn-money-time-happiness-20170724-story.html )
What I spend my money on that "buys my happiness" is grocery delivery. I used to enjoy going to the store but I began to feel that it was causing me a lot of stress. I no longer "enjoy" spending time in traffic and long lines, all the noise, all the people. Yeah, I couldn't do it anymore. I find myself spending more time at home- writing, gardening- enjoying my life instead. There are downsides to having groceries delivered but right now my sanity had to come first.
(As a side note: One of the chores I had growing up was to clean the bathroom. I hated cleaning the toilet. I could never get it clean enough to meet the high standards. So, I used to take my allowance and paid someone else to do it for me. Guess I was onto this for awhile.

Lately, I've been focusing on "leaning into" discomfort. I used to avoid being uncomfortable. I would do anything to stop the feeling or avoid it. What I've realized is that where there is discomfort, there is opportunity for growth. There are so many things in life that might feel awkward or uncomfortable simply because we aren't used to them. So, I allow myself to explore whatever the topic or issue is without trying to immediately change it.

For example, with being poly. I used to hide from my feelings. I didn't want my relationship to change. I didn't want the reality as I knew it to change. So, I'd tuck away those uncomfortable feelings and tell myself I didn't need to explore it further. But now I stay open. I recognize that I feel uncomfortable and then explore what does it mean to be polyamorous. Maybe I find an article, a website, a book. I learn more. I pay attention to how that feels as I learn more. Then it stops feeling uncomfortable.

Hope you having a beautiful day, enjoying your perfectly unmown lawn.;)

~CS
 
Hello there!

Becoming Poly for the past almost-year has absolutely opened myself up spiritually. But my spirituality isnt necessarily tied to my relationships. I will say that I felt more of an 'expansion' last summer when I had left my ex, and confirmed that "yes I AM this way", than nowadays. I guess that revelation and exercising that 'Right' to love more than one person, initially impacted me more back then when it was new. Now I have 2 mates and that is a longer story probably better suited for DMs. Which I'm open to if you are. ☺️
 
Hello there!

Becoming Poly for the past almost-year has absolutely opened myself up spiritually. But my spirituality isnt necessarily tied to my relationships. I will say that I felt more of an 'expansion' last summer when I had left my ex, and confirmed that "yes I AM this way", than nowadays. I guess that revelation and exercising that 'Right' to love more than one person, initially impacted me more back then when it was new. Now I have 2 mates and that is a longer story probably better suited for DMs. Which I'm open to if you are. ☺️
Hi AcreoCrimsonstar,

Happy to chat about the spiritual changes and that type of expansion. PM okay :)
 
Back
Top