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  1. Emm

    Delete my account plz

    Please read point #3 in the User Guidelines. Your account will not be deleted.
  2. Emm


    Yes, he was. I'll fix that now. Thanks for bringing it to my attention.
  3. Emm


    It's probably one of the most common configurations, and (anecdotally) almost certainly the most stable.
  4. Emm

    Planning vs Spontaneity

    Moderator note A post and a reply to it which quoted it have been removed from public view. If you happen to have read it before it disappeared please don't discuss it here.
  5. Emm

    ⚠️ Important note on spam ⚠️

    There should be a Report button at the top right of the PM. That will give the mod team a link to both the spam and the spammer so we can find the right account and see what they're sending.
  6. Emm

    Hi y'all

    Mike from New York with the username Barry appears also to be Peter from the UK who is posting spam-like non-sequiturs from an IP address which claimed to be in Michigan. His lack of reply to your welcome is due to his being banned.
  7. Emm

    Open vs Poly

    Moderator note: Everyone is reminded of the primary rule of this board, which is for members to be considerate towards each other. This includes both content and tone. If this thread continues in its current direction it will be closed. Please redirect the conversation toward the topic of the...
  8. Emm

    POLL: Bedsheets and multiple partlerns

    If I know I'm going to have company and it's been more than a couple of days since I last changed the sheets I'll change them again even if it's only me who's been sleeping in them.
  9. Emm

    Having trouble with kink acceptance

    I hadn't considered equipment failure as a contributing factor.
  10. Emm

    Having trouble with kink acceptance

    One of the photos was captioned with "So I literally broke a cane on (playpartner)'s butt." The cane in question looked almost as thick as my thumb. I don't think that's been more than a passing thought, but I'll keep an eye out for it. Thanks for the suggestion
  11. Emm

    Having trouble with kink acceptance

    Pretty much. I enjoy the ropework and would like to be comfortable doing it again sooner rather than later. Tickling isn't an issue in itself; it just happened to be what contributed to me overthinking it all in this particular case. We usually only get to spend time together in person every...
  12. Emm

    Having trouble with kink acceptance

    That's the plan for now. The discussion we had when I brought it up was reassuring. He thanked me for raising the issue, acknowledged what I said, apologised, explained how it had looked from his side and how he'd misunderstood the situation (without coming across as an attempt to justify...
  13. Emm

    Having trouble with kink acceptance

    Although it makes no difference in a safeword context, he's a proponent of RACK rather than SSC, due in part to his own issues with the use of the word "safe" when talking about deliberately inflicting pain and/or injury. He’s always been very careful about enthusiastic consent, and was appalled...
  14. Emm

    Having trouble with kink acceptance

    Thank you all for your advice and opinions; it's helping me organise my thoughts. I'll expand on some things and answer questions when I'm not replying on a phone, but I want to clarify that what I actually said during the tickling incident was more along the lines of "please don't do that"...
  15. Emm

    Having trouble with kink acceptance

    He'd mentioned months ago that his play partner likes to be marked, and we'd discussed how much trouble he'd had reconciling his discovery that he enjoys that type of activity with his self identity as a big cuddly teddy bear type who wouldn't hurt a fly. Intellectually I knew it was going on...
  16. Emm

    Having trouble with kink acceptance

    TL,DR: Any suggestions for how a mostly vanilla person can get over her gut reaction to the bruises her sadistic boyfriend causes to his masochistic play partner? ---------------------- My boyfriend of 8 years or so (the last 5 of which have been long distance) expressed an interest in tying...
  17. Emm

    Married men: Do you value/love your girlfriend less than your wife?

    Do you have any reason to disbelieve him when he says he loves you? You say you worry that he's using you "as something extra", but you also say you only see him as a temporary addition to your life. Does be know he's just a placeholder until someone better comes along or have you allowed him...
  18. Emm

    Triggers and trying for newbies - Beautiful relationship in the balance. Guidance Nee

    It sounds like she's not going to be happy for you to pursue anything with other women, and there's no magic wand you can wave to change that. Perhaps you need to ask yourself the inverse of all the questions you've listed. - Is it possible for you to overcome this and be actually happy about...
  19. Emm

    Guru falls

    Moderator note: If you have evidence of a sock puppet please bring it to the attention of the moderators, privately. Otherwise, you are requested to respect the privacy of other forum members and to avoid trying to publically identify those who may wish to remain anonymous.
  20. Emm

    I think my fiance's relationship is becoming abusive

    He's not responsible for her hurting herself, she is. She's turned it into a hostage situation by saying she'll hurt or kill herself if he doesn't give her what she wants. If she said she was going to hurt or kill her neighbour would he give in or would he call the police and stay as far away...