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  1. NutBusterX

    Redpepper's journey

    You are stuck in more than one stranger's head, Redpepper. I am happy to read this update and happy that you have found some peace. :)
  2. NutBusterX

    So from mono to "it's complicated" is...complicated

    Hello Darkling and welcome :) Your situation is one that is very viably successful. Lots of communication and willingness to move at the pace of whoever is experiencing the most discomfort is a plan that works well for my relationships. Lots of people here on this forum will give you good...
  3. NutBusterX

    Word Association Game!

  4. NutBusterX

    Word Association Game!

  5. NutBusterX

    Gold Rings

    Hi Mag, I didn't miss where she said anything. I am just giving an opinion and a perspective that is partially converse to yours. I wasn't picking on any single opinion or person who stated one, just adding my own.
  6. NutBusterX

    Gold Rings

    Moving to another, more tolerant place or even dating in a separate place from where a person lives is one set of solutions. I'm sure they're workable and effective for quite many people. Nance and I live in a place full of religion, hypocracy, and closed-minded-cookie-cutter monogamy minded...
  7. NutBusterX

    Am I being unreasonable?

    You want what you want. I don't think it's unreasonable. I don't think it's imaginary. I also believe it may be in the early stages of formation. The logical deduction about filtering to any specific situation is, of course, that the time it takes to find this situation may be a little more, or...
  8. NutBusterX

    Redpepper's journey

    Chrysalis Redpepper, My name is Jim. I started reading this blog about a week ago, plus or minus. I started at the beginning and read it through to the current days. You and I emote in very similar ways from what I've read in your posts. I process things like this very hard and take on...
  9. NutBusterX

    Ex wants to talk...

    From my experience, this is a cornerstone of success in poly relationships. If this condition cannot be met or reconciled through some means, hope of harmony is dim.
  10. NutBusterX

    Here we go again...

    Hi Oly, Reading your story almost makes me shudder, being that i was recently in a situation similar to yours. The main difference being that i was led to believe my partner had the intent to come clean with her primary. I wont ever put myself in a situation like that again. Period. If I cant be...
  11. NutBusterX

    An update re: three people falling in love.

    hello I have to be honest, Muri. I loved reading this post. Just know that there are folks out here who are interested and supportive of your journey. It wont always be easy or perfect. It's ok to be hopeful and fantasize about the future, and you have acknowledged that you feel like you're way...
  12. NutBusterX

    Need advice

    We are in complete agreement on this. For the record, I didn't have it anywhere in my mind that you had made a sexist statement. Shitty treatment is shitty treatment, regardless of how the chromosomes are arranged.
  13. NutBusterX

    Need advice

    Or instead of all the decisions being made by the court and waiting weeks or months or years for resolution.
  14. NutBusterX

    New and scared

    hello hi Librarian, I'm Jim. I'm sorry for your wife's breakup :( I think you did a very good job of being supportive while working on yourself through it. :) Sounds like the work guy conducted himself in a cowardly way, which is always unfortunate. Yes, stick around. This forum has a lot...
  15. NutBusterX

    Need advice

    *sigh* I remember it. I just want to emphasize the words, "mostly females." This is an accurate statement, but on occasion it happens to males as well. The phrase i like to use is, "Everybody fucks a frog from time to time" Do enjoy your day :D
  16. NutBusterX

    Need advice

    He's gauging your reaction, in order to formulate his own plans Agreements like this occur frequently before the split. This is two people talking and hoping for the best outcome by making promises. IF THESE SENTIMENTS CHANGE (and they do quite frequently) would you not feel better having...
  17. NutBusterX

    Wide Awake

    con·di·tion·ing (kn-dsh-nng) n. Psychology A process of behavior modification by which a subject comes to associate a desired behavior with a previously unrelated stimulus. I'd say you are very much in the conditioning phase at the moment. Expect to be sore and feel like quitting. As you...
  18. NutBusterX

    New Here and Curious About Polyandry

    Hello Kalea. I'm Jim. I'm glad that having a partner who you felt was untrustworthy didn't sour you on our lifestyle. :) Welcome to the forum!
  19. NutBusterX

    Overwhelmed, and sorting through a lot

    hello! hello flowerandroses, I'm Jim.An open mind is essential to being successful at polyamory. It isn't always easy, but it can be very rewarding. My advice is to go slowly, learn all you can, and communicate well with your partner. Best of luck!
  20. NutBusterX

    So Cal couple - looking into polyandry

    hello! Hello Coconuts123, I'm Jim. Its nice to have you join us here on the forum. Tons and tons of resources, info, and good people here. Welcome! :)