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Hi Micheal, welcome to the forums! I want to second Becca, that the criticism is of the fantasy and not for you personally. Your desire to keep and improve your current relationship is totally understandable. That said, your fantasy is also quite a common one and generally met with harsh...

Loved two others and slept with 4 (or 5, I lost count. Or 6 plus, depending on if she's told you about all her sexual interactions). Idk if she's poly, but she certainly likes variety! Now I won't exactly say you need to adapt to her and accept her behavior because the dishonesty is unhealthy...

Hi Myk, welcome to the forums! I'd like to give you props for coming here and doing some research on a subject that is new and relevant to your situation. I find this to be an excellent example of how mono-thinking does not seem logical to me. If I find an amazing person with qualities I admire...

Hi Redpepper, I just wanted to say hi and give virtual hugs. I haven't been here in a while but just finished reading the last 5-7 pages of this thread. So very sorry to hear about your pain and loss. Lies are so damaging. It is comparable to death when we discover the person we loved did not...

Whoops, I sort of neglected the "other partners" aspect of this: As far as "other partners" go, I think a very good tactic is to think to myself: "Would I be upset if my partner were spending time with a platonic friend?" The reason this helps is because it makes me think how ridiculous it is...

Tips and Tricks 1. Realize that there are a MULTITUDE of people out there that are "BETTER" than you. (I know this seems like a weird way to not be insecure, but stick with me! ;) No matter how smart, rich, strong, funny, recognized in my community and really, really, incredibly good-looking I...

I've "lost" several intimate relationships, but then again, ironically most of them wouldn't have happened if I had been mono and stuck with any one of the several wonderful women I could have married if I had been mono. I don't know how you do the math on that one; I lost what I would not have...

I am a big fan of poly on more than a "well, it's nice to be able to openly love more than one person" level. (My) principles of polyamory are reflected in what I consider to be the ideal or utopian form of society. (Similar to the nation of Pala in "The Island" by Aldous Huxley) They are...

Short version, very similar to vinsanity0, serial monogamist but I had a wake up call when two women I loved very much at the same time created an impasse. This led to what can only be described as a manic, passionate delving into poly philosophy. Being in a small town I was mostly on my own in...

king

Sorry OP, I did want to give a little advice about jealousy. I used to be mono and I thought "no way could I ever be poly". I was jealous, I liked being mono (serial monogamist, anyway) and I worried about disease or being "left out in the cold". So, how do I deal with jealousy? I recognize it...

I'm loving all the diagrams! :D

My status is "In an Open Relationship" and visible only to Friends. This is the same privacy setting I have for my age, work history, life events and family connections as well as the majority of my posts ("Friends Only" is my default setting, but if I want, I can switch it to "Public", which I...

I have never really delved into (researched) the possibility that Jesus never existed at all. I was raised going to a United Methodist church w/ my grandparents and later my mother switched to 7th Day Adventist. My perspective now is based on a lot of different information. I believe very...

Thanks! This forum is such a wealth of perspective! <3 It's also nice to revisit some of Nyx's old posts and mine as well for further perspective.

There is a story in the Bible about a guy who was possessed by devils (as described in my signature by-line). I know it's got a negative connotation to be possessed by devils but I like the idea of "strength of many in one" and also to me it has a poly connotation because I have the love of many...

I understand this is very difficult for you and I think there's a lot of sound advice already. Here is another opinion: There are no wrong decisions. Each one is just a different path. As I read about your situation and the following posts, I had several options pop into my head. I. Stop...

Wow, you have a lot going on! First real relationship, see him every weekend, he sees some other gf once a month (you didn't say if he's been seeing her for a month or 5 years?) I think in light of this being your "first real relationship, ever" I wouldn't worry too much. Enjoy it. If you're...

Fear and Communication It sounds like your husband is afraid. Fear damages communication. I have had very similar situations to this or situations that could have easily gotten to this point. It can be very difficult when you are meeting someone new to put the brakes on and have that...

not biology One could also say that sex itself is not biological, since there are many out there who choose or are naturally inclined to celibacy. I contend there is a strong biological connection to our behavior, both mono and poly. My "Survival of the Horniest" Theory: Members of a sexual...