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  1. Lemondrop

    Poly-Friendly Pagans?

    All of the poly people I know face-to-face are non-Christian of some variety or another. (I consider myself Pagan, as in, don't try to label me I'll just change to irritate you.) Of the people who know I'm in a poly relationship, and accept it, there is no unifying religion or faith. I did...
  2. Lemondrop


    Ack! I was taught that "warlock" means "oathbreaker". No male Pagan I know would willingly be known as oathbreaker. (Nor would I.)
  3. Lemondrop

    Quad Family

    Update Sunday is monogamous. These days, hugs are few and far between. I had a long period of grief, and I have a hard time not taking it personally, but I try to be philosophical about it. Asha, Easy and I seem to have settled into a more platonic-type relationship. No one seems to have...
  4. Lemondrop

    Successful Quads?

    I'm still around, though as you can see I don't check in as often as I might. >.< My quad has been together for three years and has gone through some changes. While we still consider ourselves family, my other male partner (Sunday) decided he was going to be monogamous (which probably doesn't...
  5. Lemondrop

    Longevity of relationships

    Look at me, coming in late. I have been married to the same man for 22 years, since about six weeks after I turned 18. I've *never* been bored with him, not sexually, not personally. I've been angry, frustrated, disappointed, resentful, sad, happy, in love, proud, tolerant, amused...all the...
  6. Lemondrop

    Too much information

    1) An awful lot of people I know have security clearances, and have reason to believe that polyamory could hurt them in a review. 2) I have children, and have reason to believe (experience) that even the people I love would turn me in to CPS if I strayed sufficiently from what was considered...
  7. Lemondrop

    Polyamory and me?

    Whatever evidence we have on evolution, I believe that what RP is referring to is the fact that *some people identify as monogamous in real life*. Right now. And they live it, whether it's hard or not. The statement that "monogamy isn't actually a natural state" is either incorrect, or...
  8. Lemondrop

    Advice Needed

    Can I also point out, at no point have you heard anything straight from the girlfriend's mouth? It's all rumor at this point. For all you know, someone told her that *you* threatened to stab *her*. Ever play telephone? If you really want a relationship with this guy, you can't let the rumor...
  9. Lemondrop

    Jealousy? Entitlement?

    Just a few thoughts, if they help... It often helps me to communicate in writing. I can think about what I'm going to say, and I don't get distracted from what I'm actually trying to communicate. Also, I feel less need to keep things to myself to avoid upsetting people. And less embarrassed...
  10. Lemondrop

    Not sure how to proceed

    I'm confused. Closed is closed. Unless she intends to change something--leave the existing relationship, talk with her partners about opening up--she has told you that she doesn't intend to move forward with a relationship with you. Also, the health of her triad relationship, while it may...
  11. Lemondrop

    Jealousy? Entitlement?

    Well, I can tell by what nycindie said, that I'm missing background that might make me sound wiser than I do right now. :) But, typical of me, I can't keep my mouth shut anyway. He said, "Most couples would have..." Well, it's not about what most couples would have. It's about the two of...
  12. Lemondrop

    How to proceed?

    Oh ho! Smart! :)
  13. Lemondrop

    My relationship may be opening up, a first for me, advice?

    You have lovely replies already, and I don't have much to add. The part that jumped out at me that didn't seem to be addressed was: " if my partner is having an easy time exploring other sexual/emotional partners while i'm at home twiddling my thumbs, i'm pretty sure it is going to hurt my...
  14. Lemondrop

    How to proceed?

    RP, 11 pages in the sticky! I skimmed them and added the info I didn't see. For anyone who hasn't looked at the Books and Websites sticky, do! It had a lot of good reviews on books I had no idea existed. Great reading!
  15. Lemondrop

    Polyamory Books, Magazines, Websites

    By request, I'm copying some recommendations here that I posted elsewhere. I've also read Pagan Polyamory by Raven Kaldera, and enjoyed it. I found it fairly gentle to a hesitant, frightened newbie. I thought that everyone on the internet had seen (and quoted) this site, but I didn't see it...
  16. Lemondrop

    How to proceed?

    Pretzels, I think that may be the most entertainment I've had all day! Thank you! :D I don't mind reading about Bonobos quite so much, but how frustrating that it seems to be billed as an exploration of the evolution of human relationships when it mostly isn't. I'm still interested in the...
  17. Lemondrop

    How to proceed?

    Franklin's pretty awesome. Now that I look at it, I think someone else recommended his More Than Two site. I really enjoy reading Polyamorous Misanthrope columns. She's got some great common sense answers to polyamorous questions...
  18. Lemondrop

    Newbie needing advice ASAP....

    NRE is new relationship energy. It refers to that time in a new relationship when you tend to make bad decisions because you're so caught up in the newness and the happiness and the this-is-going-to-last-foreverness and the this-is-my-soulmateness. It is, essentially, your hormones controlling...
  19. Lemondrop

    it's ok for her, but not for me....

    My guess is that she is feeling like needs are not getting met, but doesn't know how to express it. Possibly she feels like what she is doing is emotional, but you are going out to get sex, and that feels like cheating. Also, being new to this, possibly she feels like, if you have to go...