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Please don't take anything I say as judging I'm just coming at this from slightly different perspective. Every marriage will have its problems even the best relationships will have good and bad parts. Your fear of telling husband " I have feelings for friend that I told you was was just a...

That was beautifuly put. We all think we can go back to " normal " if things don't work out but once you've so drastically changed things going back is not a real option.

It is sad in the moment but there are great times more than there are bad yes I treat myself as a doormat sometimes maybe all the time don't have an honest answer to why other than part of me does believe I deserve to suffer. She does go cold and silent because I push her there because I know...

Ues I do hurt my self that way but I would rather me hurt than her hurt.. More likely the second i feel like I don't have a right to ask the world to fit me in. I've done horrible things and have ptsd from doing them. She tends to get cold and distant not loud and abusive. We both were very...

We agreed to one us datenight a month and I didn't communicate that I thought date night meant all night which is my fault. So to answer your question probably not. I am not good at this at all. And looking at myself in the metaphorical mirror I'm surprised we've lasted this long. My fear of...

I don't know when the dates over but I had planned it as we come home get comfy cozy up and have an intimate time.

Wife thinks it's too much to ask. I think similarly about their anniversary I don't intend on interrupting what I consider their day. I know that's a ways out as they've only been dating a few months but I don't get a text when they get back from dinner and are staying at a hotel so I think...

Well for context. We take our anniversary off every year and spend the day together. This year is the first time she's had a partner on the date so we talked agreed to not contact partners for the day. So I told the woman I've been talking to "hey my anniversary is tommorow I'll talk to you the...

O do and I'm not sure if she does

So do you all share everything about you partners with the other if they want to know or do you keep everything separate. My wife is running this as a parallel type situation and I would like a more kitchen table type thing is there a way to bridge that kind of thing or I guess I'm asking for...

I don't think anyone else deserves the pain and stress but maybe I have earned it, and we don't fight , argue in front of the kiddo we always put on the all is good show around them because they don't need to see parents fighting and we only have her 1/2 the time she lives with her mom(ex from...

I'm definitely leaving out my bad parts i don't go to therapy and haven't tried since I got my ptsd under control. And yea I hold it in but as a man thats what we are taught to do thats why I'm trying to break that cycle by expressing my self here so I can get to where I feel comfortable opening...

It has and is very possible what would you recommend abandon the woman I love and run out of fear she wants out or double down on trying to be supportive and accept that the way I imagined poly for us isn't what I wil get but I still get to be with the person who litteraly makes my heart rate...

Thank you I will take your advice to heart. I can't promise ill follow it to the letter but i will definitely take a step back and try to see it differently. I fear losing or hurting her more than anything I can imagine.

That meme is perfect Thank you for that. And I appreciate the life vest.

ok i know my spelling is atrocious and my grammar is worse but i had to clear my chest my wife and i have been together for over ten years and she is definitely not straight and is currently dating a woman who all i know anything about is her first name and that my wife cares for and is...