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That's the question I'm asking. I'm over 40. I'm obese. I have a hernia. I have no money. I struggle with depression and anxiety and a lot of trauma. And I don't even know where to find single or non-monogamous women. So what expectations are realistic for a wreck like me?

You're still not understanding. I am not talking about one particular woman. I am talking about every woman I have ever had feeling for in my entire life. The idea I just happen to meet every one of the at a time that wasn't good for them, only for the time to great a week or two later when she...

You might be on the autism spectrum. My problem isn't that people dislike me. In fact, a lot of people including many women find me friendly and likable. It's just that women always like me as a friend but never find me sexually attractive or want to date me. You seem to misunderstand. I have...

I'm trying to be careful how I say this, because I don't want people to take it the wrong way. I really do appreciate that people are just trying to help, and I'm upset with the situation and not with you or anyone else giving me advice. The problem is that I often hear the same kinds of advice...

I've tried that strategy many time, but it always leads to the "friend zone".

I believe I have purged as much of my religious indoctrination as possible and I feel good about where I am in that regard. Now I want to reinvent myself sexually. Problem is I don't know what is still a realistic expectation for me going forward. I'm over 40, have a hernia, no sexual or...

When I was a child, my mother converted to Islam. She married a Libyan man and we moved to Libya when I was 6 or 7. I lived there until I was 20, when I returned to Oklahoma to go to college, and have been on my own for the past two decades of my life. Libya is a Muslim majority country, and I...

I appreciate it. But where I seem to be getting stuck is meeting people. All the women I meet IRL are always either already taken (and monogamous) or just not interested in me or I'm not interested in her. All the usual methods don't seem to work either: none of my platonic friends have ever...

I'm trying to get a teaching job. So far, I've only worked as a paraprofessional. I've noticed. I've struggled my whole life because of my disability. Even with my education, I never could secure any decent paying job or financial security.

It's complicated. I come from a Muslim family and had an Islamic upbringing. But that doesn't mean I am a Muslim. I mentioned overcoming religious indoctrination. I've been wanting to get away for over a decade, but have not been able to because of financial limitations.

I'm interested in exploring non-monogamy in general, but polyamory in particular. I'm open to exploring polyamory or swinging, but I don't want to limit myself to either at this point. The challenge I'm facing is knowing how to find potential partners.

What is ENM? And what does it have to do with anything? I'm an atheist, not a Muslim. I've met plenty of non-religious people and none of them faced challenges dating. A while back I knew a woman who liked to bring girls to have threesomes with her and her husband. She's a Wiccan. What does...

In all honesty, I'd rather go abroad if I had the means.

I am barely scraping by one month to next. Therapy was from a state agency.

It's expensive.

Some of the immigrant communities do. But African Americans interact openly with white people and interracial relationships are very common. I could ask how Portland is different in this regard. Its a moot point anyway, since I am nowhere close to Oregon. I've hated this sh!thole I'm trapped...

I brought up the same point. I've known many non-white people, and they never had trouble dating. I prefer non-white women, but that hasn't made finding a partner any easier. I don't know about Portland, but there is no shortage of African American, Hispanic, Asian, and Native American people...

Confidence isn't something I can order from Amazon or buy a bucket of from Wal-Mart. People develop confidence from achieve successes. I can't just magically manifest confidence when all I've ever experienced is failure after failure. it's feedback loop that causes me to become less and less...

I never said I'm non-white. I have pale skin and blue eyes. Besides, not being white has never stopped anyone I've ever known from dating in America.

I just don't know. Just by numbers, shouldn't someone have expressed interest in me at some point by now? I feel like I missed out when I was young. And now, even if I do meet someone one day, I will still never have been with any woman under 40. All the women I know have children that are...