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Closed couple — RugbyMan is firmly mono and won't consider trying anything open at this time.

I haven't any practical experience to contribute, so I'm a little hesitant about jumping in here, but I did notice one thing that maybe ought to be brought up. Sometimes in talking about the time the hinge spends with each partner, people who don't have little kids forget that "family time"...

Just my two cents, and probably not very valuable as I don't have any practical experience to share, but if he's interested in exploring open relationships and polyamory, why not encourage him to come on here and do some reading and ask questions if he has them? It might give him a better idea...

Don't forget that lots of people just don't get involved with forums at all. My best friend and her husband are happily poly (they are my example for what healthy poly can be) and she tells me she has no interest whatsoever in discussing it on a forum. So there's that...

Thanks, graviton. One thing I love about this place is feeling less alone. :)

Hmm. Here's the other side of the coin, I guess: In my marriage, I'm the one who admitted to poly thoughts & curiosity; it was a no-go for RugbyMan, and after a lot of painful discussion, I put the potential to explore poly aside for him. Sometimes I tell myself we might be able to explore it...

I don't know. In my went-disastrously-sideways experience in opening the conversation (as a poly-inclined person in a monogamous marriage), I probably waited too long and repressed/worried/thought through too much before bringing it up. In retrospect, "I've heard about this polyamory thing and...

Keep in mind that there's a difference (though maybe not an easily apparent difference when people aren't accustomed to communicating/expressing these things) between pushing books and ideas on someone to change them and asking to have your point of view validated/respected even if it won't be...

I don't have any practical poly experience to contribute, but I have two children and I do know that newborns and toddlers have a huge impact on relationships and inner life -- in fact, both times, I didn't really get my normal/sane/sexy/balanced self back until baby was about three. Mileage...

Yes! I didn't even know poly was a thing until about 4 years ago. A poly couple (very close friends though we live in different cities) came out as such to me and my husband. Of course it quickly became apparent that the guy would be quite happy to get closer to me if we were open to that...

Obviously you do need to be listened to and respected in your relationship, and it's an issue if you don't feel like that's happening. But... the same goes for your partner. My intro is here if you want to know where I'm coming from, but basically I've got poly feelings and my husband doesn't...

Thank you all so much! It is so nice to feel welcome here. xox Kella

I've been lurking here for a while but tonight I just feel the need to say hello. About four years ago, I found out that my best friend is poly. I was blown away. I didn't know there was such a thing as polyamory, and I'd been feeling so guilty over various attractions and longings outside my...