Search results

Nothing happened though.

She’s great in all other aspects, which makes this all the harder to deal with. I’ve considered that’s she’s maybe a late-bloomer lesbian. Or that she’s actively having an affair. Basically any option at all.

I've told her I'm going to do that. The rollercoaster has been too much.

Maybe five years now, since she came out as bi. Looking back, there were odd things before then, though, maybe once a year, that made ZERO sense to me at the time. Looking back, it's the same pattern.

You’ve understood the situation. It’s exhausting. I’ll step back and try not to take it personally. I feel like each year her desires grow. There was a point I was willing to consider this - it took a lot of educating myself to feel ok about it, just to have the rug pulled out from under me.

I wouldn't say any struggle recently, but there is some trauma from before we met. In terms of talking about things, sometimes she's very closed down 'I would never do that'. The next she is sending me tik tok reels. Something my wife mentions a lot is that our emotional connection isn't...

Interesting suggestion. One thing that gets me is that, whilst her heartfelt apology was really appreciated, her statement that it was caused by jealousy over something I said doesn't add up. Timewise, I said the thing that upset her much later in the day. I'm not going to argue on the...

The woman she proposed for the threesome is much more my friend that my wife's. I didn't put that in the original thread just because it makes things even more complex. Right now, my wife has totally shut down and won't talk about any of it. I find it ridiculous that I'm the one who is now...

I'm not sure she really is jealous. I have reasons to really doubt what she said, and to suspect that she's covering up the unpleasant truth that she blurted out.

No, she doesn't. Not about things this serious. She's tried to walk it back, but the damage is done. I'm sick of doing the emotional work, whereas she lives in a fantasy land.

Oddly, after shutting everything down, she told me that she couldn't ever share me. I want to believe it's because she loves me so much and gets jealous. She says she wanted to hurt me over wanting this woman. If the confession is real, I appreciate it, but I almost feel like this could be...

Thanks for that reply. You've hit on something there. About the kids being away, and her gay fantasies come out. I'd not seen it before. Last night she apologised for what she said in the most heartfelt way I've ever seen her speak. I should be happy and I want to be, but I've never seen this...

I should add she has now decided I wouldn’t be able to experiment at all. I really don’t see what it in this for me at all, and the whole thing feels like a bait and switch.

I made my first post recently. [Mod edit: Here it is for reference. https://polyamory.com/threads/new-here-out-of-my-depth.158013/ ] My wife and I are new to all of this and I don’t think we are ready. We got close to a threesome situation that didn’t work out. We had just finished watching a...

I know what you mean, but why would she do this? Does she want rid of me, so she can be have multiple partners?

I'm dead against any sort of unicorn hunting. I find my wife's suggestion of this happening organically concerning. When do we get to have the conversations about needs, wants, boundaries and expectations? I don't think I even understand what she wants. Polyamory may not be for us. This might...

She really avoids talking about women. It's very hard to even pin down if she is attracted to a woman. About 5 years ago, she had an intense attraction to a married lesbian colleague that I only found out about recently. Beyond that, it's hard to even know if there is much desire there or for...

Hey everyone. I've lurked here for about two years. Spent the last year reading (Come as You Are, Ethical Slut etc). Still stuck. Firstly, I don't want to take up space here, as we aren't in this LS yet, or maybe ever. However, maybe what's going on with us will ring bells for people and they...