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Hmm. I may be. I have had a history of being an asshole (or at least so I have been told), so I try and compensate, but I may be going too far.

Marcus, I get that you were describing my actions and words there. I am not gonna debate the point, because I totally was when I think about it. As far a changes go, we have tweaked the guidelines a bit more to make them clearer. If we have to have these things, then vagueness is a problem...

They were broken because of a difference between what I said and what she wanted to hear, and that what I said could be taken as meaning two different things depending on tone and context. Why she wants them? Simply put, trust issues. She does not trust me not to do things that will upset the...

Sparklepop, you said "One thing that comes to mind is what your partner is like generally? Is she self-focussed, indulgent, impatient, deceitful, or anything else that might indicate a need to examine the bigger picture?" To be honest, she isn't really any of those things. She may be self...

I can see, quite clearly, the points you guys have made so far about being controlling, not letting her be here own person, etc. And honestly, I'm not arguing. The thing is, she set those rules, not me. In the beginning when she and I were discussing "OK, let's do this primary partner thing"...

Sorry about the format, if it is odd. I'm on a tablet. Well, I'm not new to the poly community, but I don't really have anyone I know IRL I can ask about this, without just hearing the ubiquitous 'you choose to live a complicated lifestyle, this is what happens.' I have gotten good info...