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Hi, and welcome! Queer mom here, 38. Our family is me, my co-mom, my other partner, a young child, and co-mom's girlfriend (who doesn't live with us yet). I'd be happy to chat if you want to PM me. :)

I agree, but I'm not sure if that's because the dialogue rings true for us, or because it rings true to the dialogue we have with ourselves as we're trying to overcome our shame at not following social rules about what love, fidelity, and commitment look like.

It sounds to me like you just want help with handling emotions, not a devious plot to keep the star-crossed potential lovers apart. Totally reasonable question, IMO. It makes sense to me that you might feel more jealous now that you aren't involved with this man anymore. When you were with...

I loved The Imaginarium of Doctor Parnassus.

My observation has been that a lot of gay men who are polyamorous aren't active in the poly community, so they look underrepresented in polyamory.

Welcome! I look forward to getting to know you.

Hi, all. Just adding myself to the list. :)

Thanks for the thoughtful replies. It gives me warm fuzzies to have this kind of community available, and I feel better for having gotten some feedback. I think this must be about change, as a couple of people suggested. RedPepper, you're right that I'm really happy with the dynamic between...

My partner A and I have been together for nine years; polyamory was one of the starting conditions of our relationship, and though she has been open to having another partner, she's only recently gotten involved with someone else (I'll call her C) for the first time. I've had other...

Yes! It can be very uncomfortable. I've often had to talk myself down by remembering that, yes, I feel like a cotton-brained dummy, but that's because I'm high on dopamine.

I can identify. NRE is gorgeous, but it sure can be confusing and unsettling. I think you've already gotten good feedback, and I agree with what BlackUnicorn wrote: when the NRE starts to wear off, you'll probably find yourself feeling more open to other relationships. And if you don't...

It's not selfish to want to have your cake and eat it, too. "Selfish" assumes that it's wrong to have cake and eat it, too. I don't think that's true. It's not wrong to want to continue both of these relationships. I think it's natural for your wife to be feeling conflicting emotions; even...

My primary and I have been together for over nine years, and we've been open from the beginning. I was the hinge in a V for about two-and-a-half years, but the secondary relationship ended. I think it's completely possible to make a poly relationship, in whatever configuration, last longer...

Hello, and welcome!

Great topic. I've been struggling lately with self-care; I have a hard time making time for myself, and I struggle to use my time in the most efficient ways. On forgiveness: something that helped me was becoming a mother, oddly enough. (Obviously I don't recommend having a child just so one...

That's fantastic! Sounds like a nice arrangement of living space(s).

I agree, but it sounds like there's a trust issue there. Given the on-off-on history, that may just be something they have to resolve through time and communication.

It sounds like you and your wife want a closed relationship with your girlfriend (i.e. none of you will pursue or be open to other relationships). Is this correct? If so, does your girlfriend know this is what you want? If so, do you think it's what she wants, too? I'm just trying to get...

I think this is very good advice.

Sounds like it went well, illusion! I love how self-aware and able to communicate needs your kid sounds.