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That is very nice of you, Kevin. We broke up about a month ago. I'm going to be more selective and critical with possible partners, more demanding with my preferences / expectations. I'm a better catch than I was some years ago, I've got more skills & more means. Robert Sternberg distinguishes...

I gave up on playing by the rules. Been with my now ex-partner for 2.5 years. When we partnered, I told him I was polyamorous and I wanted an open relationship. He was fine with that. Each could flirt as desired with others. We had a distance relationship, and we met 3 or 4 times a year until I...

Except 'amor' is legitimate Spanish, so 'poliamor' makes sense. You could call it multiamory if you so prefer. I'm not saying polyerosy. 'Polifacético' is multifaceted.

Going back and forth with my primary partner I've realized we need a principle, or norm, to place special protection against heartless criticism to people dear to our hearts, be it close friends or lovers. That is, I don't want to spoil/rot his relationships that he feels are important to him...

Setting aside the discussions about STIs and boundaries / decisions of each other, I know why guys want to have sex without a condom. I know this because I heard a guy talk about it in a podcast lately: http://thebiggestproblemintheuniverse.com/episode-6/ So his argument is that condoms suck...

Here in this forum, and also in books about poly relationships, honesty and openness about feelings is something very remarked because quite simply you can't expect the partner to read your mind, even more so when you're reaching the boundaries of what each considers acceptable or significantly...

"Since people are naturally aggressive, getting along / absence of violence is unachievable." That's an analogy to how the argument looks to me. Naturally, some people are more prone to some emotions, but ultimately managing one's emotions is not only workable, but necessary and convenient...

I agree with kdt26417. The best you can do is love him; be caring, respectful, emphatic and sincere. Be the best company you can be for him. After that, whether the relationship lasts longer or not, either way, you will have done the best you could on your part. He is a human being with a mind...

My perception is that OP is purposefully or unknowingly asking a loaded question. From Wikipedia: "A loaded question or complex question fallacy is a question which contains a controversial or unjustified assumption (e.g., a presumption of guilt). Aside from being an informal fallacy depending...

Remember that the window period for HIV is between 3 and 6 months, during which the results of a test can give a false negative, so I would advice to continue using a rubber until the lack of Sexually Transmitted Infections / STIs is quite reasonably certain. Your doctor will test you for the...

Hahaha! I have nothing to add, besides that I find your situations amazing, interesting and fun. I'd enjoy knowing more about it.

To me the question of the OP reveals more about his thought process than about ethics. He questions "consent" in the context of non-monogamous relationships, but not in the context of monogamous relationships, and I don't think "consent" or lack thereof is any more relevant in either. Based on...

I adore freedom. I only need to know that I am not free to do something I like, to want to do it as a challenge. If my relationship turns out monogamous in the practical sense (not exercising my freedom to date others, like in your situation), that would be a result of my circumstances, not a...

I think mono and poly relationships are funtamentally different, not the same with a different number of partners. In an open relationship cheating is less likely to occur simply because there is no reason to cheat against your main partner. You can be sincere with them without fear. That's...

Hahahaha! I just wrote what I honestly mindfully believe.

I was reading an article on Times magazine as I wrote my previous post, "The Real Reason Women Are Underrepresented in Math and Science". "One overlooked factor is that among males and females of comparably outstanding mathematical aptitude, females are more likely to also have outstanding...

I'll look into the clicker technique more in depth. Heard of it, it sounds like a lot of fun. I'm 28, and I grew up and live in Spain, but I've been to other places. I doubt the culture surrounding me has had a strong effect on my world view (other than the culture that surrounds me by...

I love your post, and I find it funny that you would start by considering human behaviour from the perspective of behaviourism, but it totally fits your background as a dog trainer. I also love dog training. I've studied some dog training techniques in the past to make sure that when I do have...

Well Dan Savage is somewhat influential. I actually don't know much about him, I don't even live in his same country, but I've heard stuff he's done before. It's in my best interest that he speaks positively about poly relationships in his love advice column, or in whatever he's doing these...

I also love IP's post and want to take some time to answer it in greater length, but what I'd like to point out in my case is that, whatever drama or reconsideration I might go through with enabling or not enabling cheating on others, my 3-year-long main open partnership is going strong, we love...