Search results

Welcome, schtuff. :) I, too, need some centering and some reminding that, despite my recent heartbreak, things will get better. nycyndie, the person you're thinking of might have been me. I've been functioning as poly for 15 years, but I consider myself to have always had that orientation. I'm...

Ooops, I forgot to say that I'm 48! ;)

I can relate, naughty. One of my girlfriends is a non-sexual relationship, but we're emotionally as close as lovers. We do a lot of snuggling and are publicly affectionate. We aren't purposefully keeping it non-sexual. It just hasn't gone there yet and may never.... We just tell people we are...

Female, bisexual - currently married to a man (previously married to a woman - before it was legal anywhere but we considered ourselves married), two girlfriends, and one long distance male lover. :)

I'll third or fourth these comments. Initiating with any long term partner can become a problem for me. Having a new partner often allows me to do better in that department because I have all this extra sexual energy flowing. :)

Yep, I saw that last night. I hope they let her date both of them! Wish she had a gf, too. :D Of course, Sookie has to survive this week's cliffhanger... :p

I'm sorry things ended badly for you, Rayek. My best advice, learned after a number of break ups, is to feel what you are feeling and not try to control those feelings. Someone here compared grief to a roller coaster. (Sorry I can't remember who.) You don't have much control over where it will...

I also believe that I love equally. But I cannot spend an equal amount of resources (time, attention, money, etc.) on each of my partners. And they don't have the same amount to give to each other their partners. I do prioritize in terms of where I believe my largest amount of responsibility...

I'd love to have a new term we can all support. :) Thanks, AnnabelMore, for starting this thread. I wish I was more creative in this department and could come up with alternatives. But I'll know it when I see it, I'm sure. ;)

I had a 12 year secondary relationship and we didn't live together. It was a long distance relationship, but we wouldn't have lived together even if we were local to each other. We did have weekends together, so we did get to wake up with each other a few times a year. Since these are the...

Hi, Cindie, You're probably right that if we hadn't been secondaries that his wife wouldn't have been able to veto. But that doesn't mean I think using these designations for prioritizing is wrong. So we will have to agree to disagree. :) Thank you for your support. I have moments when I'm...

Primary and secondary aren't rankings of "loveliness" to me. They are rankings of priority. My primary partner, my husband is my first priority. If push comes to shove, if all of my partners were to have crises at the same time, my responsibility is to my primary partner first. My secondary...

Not so much that I've been reading and finding the primary/secondary thing here...I've just been around long enough to know that some people take extreme exception to the terms. Which has always struck me as counterproductive for a group hoping for tolerance from other groups who don't get what...

Hi, I never know what to say in an intro. :confused: I'm 48 and have been actively poly for 15 years, but in retrospect I've always been poly...even before I knew the word for it. I am married to my primary partner and currently have three secondary partners (two women and one man), some long...

I'm right there with you, ygq. I recently lost a partner I am deeply in love with. I feel like I hurt more than I've ever hurt. But I have my husband and other partners that I can lean on, who will hold me when I cry and distract me. I try not to over-burden them with my grief, but they are all...