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    Question for the emotionally sensitive

    Well, that's part of the problem....he has no idea! Really the only exposure he's had to this is he has some guy friends in open relationships and they seem happy. (Mind you, he's never talked to the women in these relationships to see how they feel about it.) That, and he's just had a desire to...
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    You have a set of rules. Do you have a set of consequences?

    Something you should know about me: there AREN'T a lot of fish in the sea for me. I am a misanthrope who finds it extremely hard to meet people I connect with and also respect. I haven't met someone I've wanted to date in TEN YEARS. So is it any wonder I want to try and see if this works?? I'm...
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    Exploring this. Could use some help.

    Ok, thanks Gala. Those should be some great places to start.
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    You have a set of rules. Do you have a set of consequences?

    Yes. Those are all things I've thought about (and he hasn't). But I'm a very thorough person and don't want to step into something I haven't fully explored. And that's why I'm here asking you guys: how do YOU deal with those situations?
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    You have a set of rules. Do you have a set of consequences?

    We've already crossed the friend zone line and I wouldn't just be able to "hang out" with someone I'm attracted to. That holds no use for me anyway. I'm there for the intensity and connection. And for me that happens through physicality. The trust is not there yet because we haven't had enough...
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    Question for the emotionally sensitive

    I would say I'm the first. I wouldn't call myself poly "friendly", but maybe poly "accepting". Like I said, I don't really care what he does as long as my needs are met and at this point, that's not a lot. The problem is, this guy has a habit of inventing scenarios/fantasies in his brain and, by...
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    Exploring this. Could use some help.

    Well, that's the feeling I had, but I figured if there was a way to be safe about it and we had certain rules in place concerning that, I could be ok. The other thing I'd really like answered is what is the best way to jump into this with no primary relationship? Or is it better to start with a...
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    Question for the emotionally sensitive

    I'm mono, and not poly, and so for this to work for me I'm going to have to get what I need out of it or it's not worth my time. The guy is 43 and so I'm expecting him to be an adult and deal with this stuff himself. I don't want to be involved. It just feels like all the poly relationships...
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    Aargh. Some posts get through and others don't??

    I'm not understanding why some of my posts/threads get published right away while others say a moderator has to approve them?? What gives??
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    You have a set of rules. Do you have a set of consequences?

    Can't help there. I apparently called Dude by the wrong name on numerous occasions (I remember noting it once) - he decided to take it as compliment. Dude gets my preferences mixed up with his ex's all the time - I just correct him, he asks MrS when he can't remember. You might want to check...
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    You have a set of rules. Do you have a set of consequences?

    This is a guy whose never done this before but is interested in having multiple emotionally connected relationships at the same time....long term. From all the research I've done so far, I haven't seen this setup. There usually seems to be a primary relationship where there's a lot of trust and...
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    You have a set of rules. Do you have a set of consequences?

    I'm trying to come at this more like how you provide consequences for children. Not necessarily punishment but something that's motivating enough for them not to want to break the rules because they would be missing out on something they enjoy very much. The boundaries I've come up with so far...
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    Exploring this. Could use some help.

    I've recently reconnected with someone from my past and we are really hitting it off. We've spent two weekends together so far and it's been great. I haven't been in a relationship in 10 yrs and I'm not necessarily looking for one now. But I feel like I could commit to seeing him once a month...
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    You have a set of rules. Do you have a set of consequences?

    I was asking because I'm contemplating getting into a relationship with someone who wants to try poly but hasn't done it before. I am a mono, I guess. I have no desire or intention of seeing anyone else. Wanting to try this so I am able to spend more time with him, I'm feeling like there will...
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    You have a set of rules. Do you have a set of consequences?

    So you've both discussed your boundaries and created a set of rules you both (think) you can live by. What happens if one of those rules is broken? Do you also work out a set of consequences to go with those rules?
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    Question for the emotionally sensitive

    I'm curious about something when you have several dedicated couples going. Say your mate is having some stress in one of his other relationships. Do you feel that when he comes home? Does it change the quality of the time you spend together? Is he distracted and therefore cannot be as intent on...
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