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Clarification Do you mean that you and she are both dating him? If so, you appear to be referring to breaking him and her up. Usually trying to break up other people's relationships is a bad idea and it's generally not considered acceptable to anyone poly (that's an open relationship, but...

Um, yeah You just admitted you were preventing her from meeting A. IMO, she is being very patient with you, but she likely will move on from B if her relationship with him is dependent on you. Most poly people don't put up with outside partners controlling the pace and depth of their...

Yep, you are being unreasonable. Honestly, I don't feel you're coming off as insulting. You're coming across as ignorant. Suppose I were a bisexual female interested in a couple, as you want. Or maybe you don't care if I'm gay, straight, bi, whatever....you think you can talk me into...

Different for her I think she merely meant that her previous V was one where she and another woman were the legs and her husband the hinge....now it's switching over to where she is the hinge. Wasn't clear on whether the husband was still involved with the other woman, but if so, I don't see...

Clarification Interesting

Ty Ariakas, thanks. I would not be upset if you closed this down, it's wandered so off topic that I don't see it going back.

For the sake of However, Nycindie, I will assume that you meant no harm, but merely were careless with words. Therefore, I will answer you. I have no energy at this point to continue an argument of what I mean by involvement. Yes, I do feel that I am a part of my partner's other dating...

My Vent: Is there a reason why people on this site continually pick fights over the meanings of words? Language is fluid, what a word means to one, means something totally different to another. Why get caught up in the hassle of trying to make others buy your definitions? Also, what do...

Additionally I do not engage in passive aggressive fights with strangers online and I do not have to answer every question posed to me, especially ones I know will lead to fights. I have no interest in defining my definition of interference and influence, as I have already done so here...

Well Insulting a total stranger seems to say that you DO take quite a bit of offense, even though no malice was directed at you. And Dirt seemed to understand what I meant just fine, so perhaps the learning disability lies with you?

Ok Alright, I officially give up on maintaining any control over the direction of this thread :D Marcus, if you take offense to this, you have a thinner skin than I thought :-p

Sorry, but What do you really expect anyone here to tell you? Realize you two just aren't right for each other (which is what I'm hearing), split, or repress a part of yourself to be with a woman you love. Maybe it's worth it, maybe not. No one here can tell you how to feel or how to live...

question Do you want to have us tell you what you want to hear or what you need to hear? Cuz Marcus definitely isn't going to do that. Some of us actually are experienced and we're sensing red flags that tell us you're swinging, not poly. Poly is hard. If you honestly believe you are...

Ty Lookingglass, thanks for bringing back to original topic. Oh, and Dirt, appreciate your support, but getting in the middle of troll fights is pointless. :)

Swingers Even swingers have emotional connections to those they play with. What you're hinting at is hierarchical poly, meaning roles and importances are defined. Look up primaries and secondaries. Many poly people shy away from that, seeing it as controlling. It also often fails. You...

hmmm Like most threads, this has ultimately devolved to a question of semantics.... ah, well. :) Please only post comments to the original post. ... I'll respond to those :)

Hold on Of course you have the right to make up your own rules...I don't think you're wrong. Actually, I don't think EITHER of you are wrong. Being poly is one thing, practicing is another. Practicing a poly lifestyle is actually very difficult. You don't really know what's going to...

Really "While I certainly have a preference, it's still not my business to interfere in her life or her relationships." I disagreed and said I felt that sounded to me like you didn't think you had any right to be influencing her decisions. Which apparently you don't actually believe. I know...

Sorry :) Sorry to leave you out, Nycindie :) But your questions are too broad for me to know how to answer without a real risk of offending you. I never said lack of intersection is a lack of respect, for example.

"In my mind," exactly. There are different personal views on what interference and involvement mean. I defined mine in a previous example. "Say you and I were to date, and you never wanted me to meet IV. That's certainly your right, but I'd probably have issue with our relationship heading...