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    Seeking poly questions for my blog's Q&A...

    Hi everyone, It's been quite a while since I've posted here, and I hope this is the appropriate place for this posting... I'm a freelance writer by trade, mainly focused on feminist topics; I have a chance to write about poly occasionally, but I've recently started my own blog...
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    "Hi, I'm poly and I don't exist."

    I think arguments based in nature are really problematic in general; I feel that way about their use in the LGBT-rights movement as well. The bottom line is that it shouldn't matter whether it's a choice or not, everyone deserves the same rights. Allowing the entire argument for equality to...
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    Everything is fine! (but...)

    Kamala, I relate to a ton of what you're saying. I used to think I was primarily interested in sexual openness with the possibility of something evolving into more of a relationship under the right circumstances, but since winding up in a relationship with my boyfriend I've realized that I'm far...
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    Big issue, little time

    For me, it's innate. Or at least, non-monogamy is. I have always struggled with monogamy, made it clear to my husband for years that I would prefer a non-monogamous relationship, and ultimately reached a breaking point where I don't think our marriage would have survived if I had tried to remain...
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    Feeling odd

    I agree with redpepper. I've been with my boyfriend for over 7 months, and have gotten to a place where everything feels super comfortable when my husband, boyfriend, and I are all hanging out, but we still pretty much avoid the physical affection entirely in those situations, and that's working...
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    Everything is fine! (but...)

    I'm no expert, but I think one of the best things you can do is remind yourself that it's okay to have a range of emotions about the thought of your partner being with someone else. I've definitely learned that even though I'm the one who wanted this arrangement, even though I am the happiest...
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    Telling younger kids

    My daughter is almost 7, and we've never talked to her about it, but we also don't make any attempt to hide it. She's seen my boyfriend and I hold hands and kiss (only the variety of kisses that are appropriate in front of a child, of course). I don't think she really has a concept yet of what's...
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    The importance of sex

    Again, I think the difference is that those dry spells you have experienced were due to the feelings/needs of that partner. It wasn't someone external to that relationship telling you and Christie that you weren't allowed to be intimate. For me, that's where the no longer natural and organic...
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    The importance of sex

    For me (and I may be strange for this, but I do feel like I relate to a whole lot of what Christie is saying), either a sexless marriage or sexless other relationships would be potentially be okay if the lack of sex was not externally imposed. If my boyfriend said, "I am not interested in ever...
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    Poly = hippie?

    I'm more of a hipster than a hippie, at least judging based on appearances. If I had to categorize myself somehow I'm an academic and an anarchist, definitely not into the sci-fi stuff and whatnot. But I don't have any kind of poly community outside of my two partners, so I can't speak of what's...
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    Coming Out...again?

    I don't have much advice other than to say that you're in pretty much exactly the same place that I was when I finally seriously broached the subject with my husband (after years of him knowing I was poly-inclined, but I had always let it drop when he expressed his discomfort instead of really...
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    The importance of sex

    This is interesting to ponder for me, because my relationship with my boyfriend has been minimally sexual, partially due to circumstance and partially because neither of us feels that it's a huge priority in our relationship. We're very physical, but the majority of the time I would say it's...
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    Please help me understand monogamy

    This pretty well sums it up for me. Before he was finally accepting of poly, my husband used to have the mindset of "Why should I be the one to compromise and you not have to compromise at all?" But he was asking me to compromise who I *am* by asking me to be monogamous. I wasn't asking him to...
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    Mono secondary--how does this work?

    I can't respond to this from the point of view of a mono partner, but I am in a similar position to A; I'm married and also have a boyfriend. My boyfriend isn't mono, but so far he only dated someone else for about a month of the time we've been together, so my experience has essentially been...
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    Touch

    See, I approach these concerns in a fairly opposite manner. I have some friends who I know aren't really comfortable yet seeing me be affectionate with my boyfriend, but I totally refuse to modify my behavior on their account. They know the situation, and they're just going to have to get used...
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    Pathology and Poly

    But it seems that part of the issue here is that for many people who are "deviating from the norm" in some way, their daily life *is* severely impacted. The tendency then seems to be that the problem lies with the individual who isn't "fitting in," not with the society which refuses to accept...
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    Feedback please! Can you convert back to being mono after discovering you are poly?

    I totally sympathize. I was the one who made the push for poly in my marriage, and I knew for years that I was poly but tried to push it aside because my husband wasn't comfortable with it. I don't know if it's possible to make that shift back to mono, but I do know that if I would have...
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    Pathology and Poly

    I think that the pathologizing (I know, that's not really a word...) of sexuality is a huge problem. It's done all the time with regard to BDSM; I've heard many, many people make the assertion that BDSM practices are not "wrong" in an ethical sense, but are instead "unhealthy" or the...
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    And what about Guilt?

    That's interesting, I'm the 'hinge of a vee' too, and I totally know what you mean about having concerns over everyone feeling good and supported, worrying about how you're dividing your time, etc., especially as my husband and I are still relatively new to this and he still struggles with it...
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    Extroversion, Introversion & Ambiversion

    I feel extroverted and introverted in different ways. I think of myself as fairly shy, and I'm not really comfortable being thrown into social situations where I don't know anyone and meeting people on my own. But I do like going out and being around other people often as long as I'm with at...
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