Search results

  1. S

    Bad introduction to polyamory.

    Thank you, all. This has sincerely been insightful. I'm going to spend a couple of weeks away. Get my head straight before I make any final decisions. I'd say I'd like to flirt around a bit, but I don't think it would be fair to anyone I might end up with while I'm lugging around this 5...
  2. S

    Bad introduction to polyamory.

    Point taken. True, but also based on a running track record. This is fantastic insight. I do think you're focusing a bit hard on manipulation though. It is very present, certainly, but I don't believe I'm actively manipulated outside of her BS method of presenting it all to me. It's...
  3. S

    Bad introduction to polyamory.

    That must have been one confusing mess. That's something else that bugs me about this. I don't know this person. I may think he's an upstanding individual otherwise, and I may appreciate what he's done for her on some level, but I just don't really want anything to do with him. Perhaps I...
  4. S

    Bad introduction to polyamory.

    I second guess my self. It's like "hey, I'm going to go ahead and be vulnerable and show you me, but oh, damn, something already feels wrong just in the fact that I don't expect to be reciprocated. Well, this is just awkward." It's a catch 22; to be comfortable with her in particular, I need...
  5. S

    Bad introduction to polyamory.

    Yes. Yes I am. When I say it gets muddy, I mean that I'm immediately aware when interacting that the weight and respect, and the level of attraction, that I give to her isn't matched. I stumble then, and get too anxious to just be as I would with anyone else. It's about vulnerability, I...
  6. S

    Bad introduction to polyamory.

    Through the roof. I was so sure of myself that I was untouchable. A lot happened in the last few years, some of it related to my relationship, some of it completely not. For the last year, I've kind of just been trying to feel my way out of a pit of loathing. That's my point. My...
  7. S

    Bad introduction to polyamory.

    Yes, my self-esteem was already critically low before all of this. It's not a matter of finding someone that could be equally as good for me, though. I'm still young, am bright, and at the risk of sounding like a braggart, am ridiculously attractive. That's actually a good question, though...
  8. S

    Bad introduction to polyamory.

    Of course not. I'm not her; I don't know what's really going on in her head, I can only go off of what I see objectively. Resistant to continuing without finding personal resolution to all of this. As I said, at this point it's either "deal with it and move forward" or "get out". Meanwhile...
  9. S

    Bad introduction to polyamory.

    I see honesty now, yes. Either she's had some realizations and it's an ongoing shift, or it's just some temporary honeymoon phase and she's still basking in afterglow from the other week. The reason for our delay was that, initially, I wasn't cool with settling down. She actually proposed to...
  10. S

    Bad introduction to polyamory.

    I'm not sure. Apparently he was unaware of me the first time, and after that, she told him about our engagement and how she has no intention of breaking it off. Obviously, they continued anyway. It all just seems so...casually intense between them. I'm having difficulty wrapping my head...
  11. S

    Bad introduction to polyamory.

    LovingRadiance, I'll do that. Maybe put things into perspective. TheCubist: Exactly. And that's the bit that really cuts deep. She listens, and she's tried to be supportive, but when it comes down to it, she hasn't actually done anything to try and make this right to me other than that. Pretty...
  12. S

    Bad introduction to polyamory.

    So here's my predicament. My relationship hasn't been doing well for the last two years for various reasons; in large part due to my own personal issues preventing my fiance of six years from getting what she needed out of me which, in turn, prevented me from ever getting what I needed out of...
Back
Top