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. Ultimatums have no place in a mature loving relationship. Listening, adapting, respect, empathy, compassion are what I would look for and hope to find. To know you have caused hurt and respond with an ultimatum....?

hello I think the appeal of this forum is that it gives one space to explore thoughts which general society would not allow. The people here are empathetic, considerate, intelligent and (so rare in many online forums, whether personal or business related) well mannered! Already I have been able...

. I have never been able to disconnect the two. The one will always interfere with the other. But that's maybe a girly thing. :) The mind. Without an intellectual connection the chemistry is dead in the water for me. As to suitability, there's always risk isn't there? I have never quite worked...

Now there is an attitude I love! Not in a hurry and fine with that. 'slow entry and recovery' works for me on so many levels ;)

. I think it is impossible for us here to comment on the other people in your life. They all have needs, gaps which drive their behaviour. Focus on you. The opinions of other will only hurt if you have a bad relationship with yourself. I'm not sure if you're in UK or US. But the Farm contact...

. Fear is always worse than the fact. You seem in a very bad place right now in your life. A place where you feel that you are reliant on others and have no choices and those others are letting you down. In no way are the decisions you have to take going to be easy ones but first, and before...

Crikey guys! If there were ever a thread to make me think I am not cut out for Poly this is it :) I have trouble organising my single life right now. Involving one person let alone more and having to fit around their others ... wow. Making me feel like becoming a recluse!:o

So sorry It's a pig when you feel in love but that doesn't make you feel good about yourself. The mind has a way of playing such tricks when we are feeling insecure. Can you truly say that this person is thinking of your needs and if not then why don't you think that you deserve someone who is...

What a lovely set of replies and thank you for the welcome. I'm not sure it always hits that chord - feeling younger inside. Referring to my attitude at work a colleague recently said to me, "If I didn't know your life I'd put you at least 10 years younger." That would make me her age. It felt...

I have visited here often out of curiousity. So now I am saying 'hello' but still from behind a veil. That is just my need for privacy whilst I consider my path. I find this forum one of the most respectful I have read online. And that is not particularly relationship forums, I mean business...

unsure If you are doing it for him, are you sure that it is right for you? You need to be honest with each other before all else but what I find hardest is being honest with myself.