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Love may be infinite, attention is not. It is okay to feel the loss of exclusive attention. It is also okay to need and ask more attention so that you don't suddenly feel abandoned. At the same time, it is important to understand that the loss of attention is not deliberate and more likely a...

I'd say don't worry about the labels. Have the relationships you feel the need to have and the descriptors will fall into place. To describe the flip side of your labeling problem, I have had only one partner since I openly called myself poly, though I've been interested in a few people on and...

You seem okay with the idea of poly and dealing with unfamiliar feelings of jealousy even though you trust her. Welcome to the learning curve. Sounds about normal for a kick off. I'd say discuss your concerns with her. What is bothering you? Also, her being poly does not mean you MUST be...

I don't see where the problem is in falling in love or crush or sex with your partner.

If a man wanted me to leave my partner for them, I'd RUNNNNNN!!!! Even if I was done with a partner, it would freak me out that being with them meant monogamy. I am so not going back to that prison of expectations. If I had only two experiences and both wanted me to leave my partner for them...

I am less worried about the "on the side" or whether you should be friends with the metamors or not, etc. Whatever works is good. But the part where she deleted you off a social group while pursuing your husband before she knew that you were opening your relationship is more worrying. IMO, a...

Sorry to sound pessimistic, but I think the lawyer will probably turn out more useful than the counsellor. In my observation, once deliberate unkindness enters a relationship, it is very hard to reverse it. Whether or not Salt works out, you may end up having to ditch husband in any case...

It is easy when a relationship is clearly "toxic". Most of the times, there are no clear cut lines. Some things work well, specific areas can be horrendous and it is hard to know whether the good parts are worth suffering the bad ones for. Depending on how things are in the moment, you become...

What help is your wife getting with depression? How is your relationship otherwise? How are her relationships with other people? Is she engaged and involved and affectionate? Does she appreciate non-sexual affectionate touch from you? Or is she distant and wants to be left alone? Is she...

The couple in question. The two (or more) people in question evaluate. If there is an adverserial or patronizing attitude toward a partner, the relationship will have problems regardless of whether the partners open up or not or whether they communicate as I suggested or any other manner. A...

My mom is super-conservative and has always freaked out at anything I did. The good part is that she's now used to freaking out. So her status on Spexy is that I should not have sex with someone I'm not married to. Spexy comes and we live together quite openly and in the same home. She is fine...

I imagine it would be hard to remember to keep a secret as big as sharing your life with someone. Personally, I wouldn't have a huge issue with PDAs and such, given that I am rarely in public to begin with and am reserved enough to not get into PDAs for the most part. I don't rule them out...

If you can't be yourself with a partner, it is a problem and barring non-relationship ties that may be more important considerations, moving on may be better. That said, don't base something this big on an assumption of what she would or would not like. Be yourself. If she cannot handle it...

Don't know whether she is that eager about your relationship or not, or just has very poor boundaries when it comes to families. Mothers and grandmothers can get pretty "tunnel-visioned" into the roles. On another thread, you have also spoken of her issues with coping with divorce, getting...

I always trust inexplicable feelings. You should probably talk to him and ask him to go slow. I don't really see relationships as a scoreboard where everyone has "equal freedom" to pursue things. It may sound hypocritical, but in my view, every person is different and the challenges and...

Depends on how we are defining monogamy - practice or commitment. I've never been in more than one relationship at a time, mostly because I don't do casual relationships, and no one seemed worth the hassle of tuning into another person and balancing the whole thing while I was already with...

Whose idea was it to open up the marriage? Your wife's anger about girlfriend is understandable. It is one thing to be fine with you having another relationship, it is quite another to lose you to it. If you knew you were transitioning, you probably should have done it cleanly by divorcing wife...

The short duration of the relationship was definitely a good thing, but LDR added to problems. EVERYTHING was worse because it was LDR. Spexy was lying about crucial things and I had no way to even get an idea of what was really going on. It is a pretty serious relationship and not the...

If she already knows about the job your husband has lined up for her, it could be an incentive - to get mentally fit and ready with the energy and positivity her new role is going to need from her.

My mom has schizophrenia and a couple of days without meds and she becomes.... odd. She creates strange meanings out of real or fictional happenings, suspects people, is always bewildered or sometimes aggressive. It doesn't subside till she takes her meds again. Once she is back on the meds, she...