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Thank you Thank you to everyone for your thoughts. They really helped me to see more clearly what I should do, even though my understanding of what is really going on remains vague. For those who like to tie up loose ends, I asked him to come home Monday night and see her Tuesday instead. I...

I liked nycindie's boundary-setting advice, but I think the above is a bit cut-and-dried. There is a big difference between 'asking for permission' and 'taking into account the other person's feelings'. I would be inclined to use the admission of not being comfortable to probe further and find...

My first reaction was that it smacked of instability, and A did make the same observation you did, but she perturbed him by saying that the only reason he's polyamorous is that he has fear of abandonment from an emotionally unavailable mother. (Ironic no?) He's been chewing that over for the...

Thanks for your thoughts, Kevin. I don't know whether it's guilt. I think its more the nature of our relationship - I am submissive to his Dominant, though it is more 50s marriage than chains and whips, as he likes to say. Also, I have been excluded a lot over the course of my life, and it is a...

Hi everyone, I've been in an open relationship for the last 2 years with my bf A. We swing periodically and have sex separately with other people, when the opportunity arises. I am bisexual and he is hetero. I have always known that he is poly. He says that it is something he is, not something...

Hi everyone, It's been a few years since I used a discussion list, but I have found a lot of help, solace and even good friends in forums over the last 15 years. Now it's time to broach a different subject in my life. I've looked in at you all occasionally for the last few years, but this time...