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I'm sorry if this sounds bitch but maybe it will help. I was the badgered spouse who my husband attempted to talk into something I did not want and was not ok with for years. Frankly, I think it's abusive. It got to the point where I finally said you know what, I've told you no repeatedly. If...

This is what I was thinking too. I've had women try this with me and it makes me very uncomfortable. I don't want to be a part of that. I don't think it's healthy.

He doesn't sound ok with this at all. It sounds like he's just accepted you're going to cheat on him and this is the only way he can keep the marriage together.

We didn't hide it. We just answered questions honestly in an age appropriate way. I've known a lot of people who hide it from their kids and their kids know and don't appreciate their parents thinking they're too stupid to figure it out. I don't think that's a good way to handle it. Maybe it...

OP, I'd be really hurt by this suggestion and I don't think it's reasonable at all. I'm sorry you're dealing with it. I don't know what advice to give but I hope it works out for you.

I thought that was a pretty weird claim too. In fact, I've been having some real issues in my life because it is absolutely not true for the men in my life. Sex definitely is not their primary need. Some days I really wish it was though. LOL But yes, I agree with you. People are all different.

It isn't really any different from very close friendships to me. I love my best friend. She's at that same level as my partners. The only difference is I don't want to have sex with her and I do want to have sex with my partners. If I didn't, I would see them as close friends that I love.

Not to me, no. I've really liked some of my husband's girlfriends and have been friends with some. If they started referring to me as their partner, we'd need to have a sit down talk because I'm not ok with that. I'm not their partner.

I don't really encounter this because I refuse to explain myself to anyone I'm not in a relationship with. If it's no, then it's no. The end. If they demand me to justify telling them no then I see them as a garbage person and I move on and forget about them. It's just rude and entitled...

I can't be fully independent due to health issues and I still consider myself polyamorous. So yes, I think my existence is possible.

Am I understanding this correctly? It sounds like she found out you were cheating and is now being told you will continue to cheat on her but you would like her to agree with that. Do her feelings matter to you at all? She's probably in a lot of pain right now.

I'm sorry that happened to you. I will admit I'm a ghoster. I used to think it was rude as well but being polite about it has not worked well for me in the past so now if I get spooked by something early on I vanish.

Oh my god this is unbelievably cruel. You aren't wrong for being hurt. Please don't marry this man. You can't handle this situation and that is ok. I don't think most people could handle it. I certainly couldn't. You had a mental breakdown over it. Your mind has sent you a clear message that...

Oh my god Fuchka, thank you so much for using the term "bitch vanilla wife." You can't know how much it helps to see someone else use the term. It makes me feel like I'm not just being crazy. That's exactly how I feel. And I have heard that term from some of his girlfriends. They don't direct...

Thank you both for your responses. It helps a little to get it out somewhere I won't be instantly judged as bad. I told him I was starting to take herbs to decrease my libido to help the issue and he didn't like that. I don't know what else to do. It hurts but I'm willing to stay in a sexless...

I've had to end a relationship because of his primary relationship before. My husband and I were dating a couple. My husband's relationship with the wife ended. I was close friends with her. It was not pleasant but that relationship needed to end. It wasn't healthy. If they had a disagreement...

I agree with this. Communicating is very important.

I'm not sure what to write and never thought I'd end up in this situation. I've been married and poly for 17 years. We have a good relationship, except for sex over the past couple of years. And I'm trying to be ok with that but I'm not doing so well. It started when my husband developed an...

I have schizoaffective disorder. I disclose it on the second date. If I like them enough for a second date there may be a future and I want to know right away of its a deal breaker for them. In my case I also worry that I may have an episode while with them and I want them to know what's happening.