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  1. R

    The road(s) less traveled

    Indeed Fourteen, fifteen months later. Wow, how time has flied. Sometimes like an eagle, sometimes like a wounded duck! Another day, perhaps, for the details of the story, but today is time for a summary. There is a common theme of "being OK" in this post, and it is repeated a lot....it's...
  2. R

    Terrified of the whole idea. Please analyse/counsel me

    Progress!!! Agreed. Your list is centered around fears. I made a list like that about 5 months ago. Every time I had odd/weird/negative feelings about poly topics, I referred to my list and figured out which one(s) applied. Then, when the moments passed and I realized that the moment had no...
  3. R

    Yet another polynoob..

    Full circle, or spiral.....(or, what a difference a year makes?) So, it's been a year or so since I've posted here; I've found that reading articles and books and listening to podcasts has worked better than throwing my cares and concerns out in an anonymous forum (no offense)....but despite...
  4. R

    The road(s) less traveled

    A new week Hard to believe that its been this many weeks since we had to move from the wondering part of our marriage to the, slap, time to make some decisions and actually talk part! :) It really is like the roller coaster so many people mention! There are some seriously high ups to talking...
  5. R

    The road(s) less traveled

    Curious More talking, here and there. She wants to have more time so that we can have longer talks and not be interrupted. But she's coming around to the idea that these things just cant wait to be scheduled a week or two down the road. And that she cant use scheduling to avoid it. Its...
  6. R

    The road(s) less traveled

    Reply....and update We are not pushing the boundaries right now. Because of our situations, we each see our friends here and there; and agree that they deserve to be kept in the loop while we re-establish ourselves and our expectations. Her friend is also my friend and I don't want that cut...
  7. R

    The road(s) less traveled

    another day Slow going, but thats ok, and its what I'm learning is the right thing. Lots of everyday life to experience and enjoy; family, work, etc. While there has always been a lack of time to have one on one adult conversation, we have tried to make it happen. Now we KNOW it has to...
  8. R

    Yet another polynoob..

    Ya, learning some of that already :) I am way too optimistic about lots of this, which isn't like me because normally I border on the pessimistic/realistic view of life. Not to sound like a member of congress and reserving the right to revise and extend my remarks, but maybe if I try to say it...
  9. R

    Yet another polynoob..

    I could see how that could happen....too easily Knowing how the two of us got to where we are (well, as much as I know so far), I could very much see a similar issue come up. In fact, I've already laid the ground work to have a beer with him...needs to be done. I fully expect the other...
  10. R

    The road(s) less traveled

    I've always been a closet blogger...well, using a private blog as a journal. Putting it out there has been another story. I came to the forum and did my introduction post, then did the obligatory "I'm a mess" post to New to Poly, and the next logical progression is to move here...
  11. R

    New and Scared

    Thanks and support Thank you, Bangel, for sharing your journey with us. It helps to know, from you, and others, that this process can be difficult and painful. It seems that you have done all the work and soul searching to be honest with yourself, but the success stories here seem to be from...
  12. R

    Yet another polynoob..

    Positive, but realistic! Thanks! I'm well aware, and more than a little scared of the journey. I AM being positive but there is sooooo much to consider and so much to talk about it. Just trying to learn as much as I can from others, recognize the negative aspects of how we got here alone...
  13. R

    Yet another polynoob..

    Thanks so far!!! You all have no idea how much I appreciate the candid responses. The transition from cheating to poly may not be as difficult as it normally would seem as we've built a bit of a foundation already. There is a thrill of the secret factor here for her that I very much...
  14. R

    Working through the kinks (no, not THOSE kinks)

    Hi, Early 40s married man in a happy (but currently stressful) marriage to a early 30s woman who has made me the luckiest guy on earth. We've had many discussions about non-monogomousy and how it is possible to love many people. I've done lots of reading, and am coming to a comfort zone of...
  15. R

    Yet another polynoob..

    Like so many others, I am new to the forum. In the spirit of netiquite, I've spent a couple of days reading other people's stories and issues before just throwing mine out there.....normally I'd wait longer, but I could really use some other perspectives on my situation. Been happily married...
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