Search results

  1. Janro

    Long post about hardships in trying to make (first time) non-monogamy work

    So, Chad and I broke up, as he chose to leave me in order to pursue his relationship with Mandy, and told me he didn't want me limiting him in any way. Turns out Mandy's been pushing him to do it as well, or so he tells me. It could be that he just can't take the responsibility of the decision...
  2. Janro

    Long post about hardships in trying to make (first time) non-monogamy work

    Our original agreement was to discuss and agree upon practices before anything concrete happened, though we probably weren't even nearly clear enough about it with each other. I didn't know Chad was having sex with other people during our relationship, so it never occurred to me to ask. Once I...
  3. Janro

    Long post about hardships in trying to make (first time) non-monogamy work

    So, during the past three weeks things have sort of both progressed and not progressed. To make it easier to keep track I'll call my boyfriend Chad, and my metamour Mandy. I have been looking into love languages as well as disentangling and detaching myself from Chad's things that aren't really...
  4. Janro

    My boyfriend doesn’t want me if I’m poly

    I'm not sure I'll have any practical advice, as in a way I'm quite new to non-monogamy myself, but I've been in a sort of similar position as your boyfriend and wanted to share my experience in case it'd help at least some. My boyfriend cheated on me multiple times, each time we tried sorting...
  5. Janro

    Long post about hardships in trying to make (first time) non-monogamy work

    Thank you. I feel you've managed to put into words exactly the contributors to the conflict going on inside me. If nothing else I think I've just become so much more paranoid and hyper vigilant that I get a gut feeling of everything not being quite like it seems more easily than before...
  6. Janro

    Long post about hardships in trying to make (first time) non-monogamy work

    I think this is partly the reason why I'm having a hard time with this whole thing. What you describe is something I wish we had had. Had he said something like that from the beginning then things would have been much clearer all around, and both of us would have been in a much better position...
  7. Janro

    Long post about hardships in trying to make (first time) non-monogamy work

    Our first conversations at the beginning of our relationship about these things didn't. Which is why once I first time found out about how he'd not told about the other relations we went into a lot of detail about what we are expecting of ourselves and the other, and how we'd like to conduct...
  8. Janro

    Long post about hardships in trying to make (first time) non-monogamy work

    Glutton for punishment might actually be on the right track in a way. After my initial post I came to the realization that most of my connection with my boyfriend, and apparently his connection with me when I talked about this with him, comes from the emotional intensity of him acting up, me...
  9. Janro

    Long post about hardships in trying to make (first time) non-monogamy work

    They were to meet again yesterday. During the weekend my boyfriend and I discussed things again and he was very adamant that the next time he meets the woman he needs to have sex with her, or she won't hang around any longer and he refuses to lose people from his life. At this point I'm thrown...
  10. Janro

    Long post about hardships in trying to make (first time) non-monogamy work

    Hi! I'm an asexual (sex-favorable or sex-indifferent mostly) pan-romantic non-monogamous cis-woman in my mid-thirties. Being somewhat socially awkward I haven't been in that many relationships, and thus far all have been pretty monogamish, and I strongly believe that openly and honestly...
Top