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  1. N

    Our poly mono relationship

    It is almost a year - 9-10 months to be exact - since my ex husband left us and my boyfriend/fiance and I have lived monogamously ever since. I have dealt with the grief of the breakup, which was not mutual. And there has emerged a sort of honeymoon energy between me and my boyfriend. So it...
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    Relationship downsizing

    I will stay in touch. Best of luck with your plans to marry and close the distance :) I have noticed one thing recently, and that is that he is turning slightly more jealous since we became a mono couple. He is not super jealous, and has apparently zero worries over the distance and my male...
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    Relationship downsizing

    If my life with my husband has taught me anything, it is that serious discussious about being on the same page may mean zero when it comes down to it. Because all that matters is if people are doing what needs to be done to make it happen. It think it is more correct to put it as that he is...
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    Relationship downsizing

    I plan to be honest, it is more like a matter of how to be honest in the best way :) I think we will continue as a mono or pretty mono couple. We may still be long distance for a few years weather we like it or not (since it takes a year to get divorced and at least 6-9 months to get a finance...
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    Relationship downsizing

    Thank you. I am not planning to break up with my boyfriend :) I want to marry him more than anything.
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    Relationship downsizing

    Yes, we have talked for the last three years of the possability of him moving to my country. We already considered work immigration visa to make it happen. He has started to learn my language. Yes, a lot of things are happening now :)
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    Relationship downsizing

    I am 37 years old, I turn 38 in a few months time. I am fertile, according to the gynecologist I saw two months ago. I notice that I still get periods on time. The question is how long my good fertility will last us, since it will realistically be at least two years until we can live in the same...
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    Relationship downsizing

    I think he wants to be mono, more or less (he mentioned threesomes as something he would be attracted to try once). I pretty sure he wants to marry me - it has been his complaint in the past that he was not able to. I want him to introduce him to my family before we make any final decitions, but...
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    Relationship downsizing

    It is illegal as a single woman in my country to freeze eggs unless you are terminally sick. I can have it done abroad.
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    Relationship downsizing

    Yes, I am looking at it from that angle for the most part. We will get a new legal option that we did not have before, and why not make use of it. It is not an option until a year from now (plus with international fiance visas, probably add another six months at least), so it is not possable to...
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    Relationship downsizing

    Well, who knows. Maybe not even him, yet. We need to take time to get to know each other better in this new situation. I/we also need to settle the estate before I/we can realistically afford children anyway.
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    Relationship downsizing

    It has been some months since my ex-husband left me (and my boyfriend) and it seems likely that we will not get back together. I have heard that it is usual that one person leaving can result in the whole relationship structure to disintegrate, and I am at times fearful for it happening to us...
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    Lies and Divorce

    That sounds a bit similar story to me and my ex/husband. Except in our case, he had a mental breakdown of sorts in my arms, went with me to therapy and still goes there (without me). I too dont understand why he now says he did not want it, when I used so much time (years) to be sure he was ok...
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    Need Advice on Handling a Situation

    Do you normally actually answer phone calls during sex? Really? That is kind of rude...both towards the person you have sex with, and the person you talk to, who for sure can hear your horny voice on the other end and know what you are doing. There are lots of options to get back to the...
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    having a baby with your secondary

    Obviously, it is a good idea to look into the legality of having kids with plural partners where you live. That goes for things in good times and bad, as well as when the kids become adults. Interesting to hear people talk about college money etc. Here, the state funds that (loans and...
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    How to talk about new life plans (poly to mono)

    Hi, I was originally planning to have kids with my ex, we made all the preperations for it but instead we broke up. Now I find myself in a mono relationship with my boyfriend. We are happy, although our relationship feels a bit severed sine my ex left. It was always the understanding that I was...
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    Agree to these rules?

    It sounds like a very recent breakup. Feelings will be expected to be raw. Regardless of anyone being toxic, it sounds like a good idea to leave any new partner out of you keeping in touch with your step-child. A practical solution could be that your new GF drives you, while not actually...
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    Are there long-term mono-poly relationships?

    I have dated my boyfriend 4 years and was until recently in a 13 year old relationship with my ex/husband. There was a relationship escelator involved in that I was becoming more intertwined with my boyfriend mixing money, having marriage-ish talks etc. Sadly, my ex/husband backed out of the...
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    Understanding a break-up

    What do you mean by "read between the lines"? The objective situation is that my exhusband has left me. He moved out of our common flat, changed his last name, and filed for an official seperation. When I meet him, my moods, words and actions are somehow slightly wrong to him - it even annoyed...
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    Understanding a break-up

    I am happy that my depressed ex is seeing his doctor and a proper therapist and not just struggling on his own. I also feel good about that I am able to not loose my temper with him. I was numb the first couple of weeks after the breakup, now I feel ready to take care of myself and my boyfriend...
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