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  1. Hades36

    Sleeping Arrangements and Beds: Merged Threads, General Discussion

    You had me at "black and curvy" lol. :D But seriously your post actually made me think about some other things regarding poly and gender...interesting. Nuff said. Good endorsement for the Serta product, though! :cool:
  2. Hades36

    Polyamory and Ethnicity

    Hey everyone! It's been a long time since I was on this board, even as a lurker. But, yeah, so i see you folks are still talking about the minorities in poly thing? Cool! I have actually found a small, secret cabal of minorities in Philly who are poly. They often also intersect with a few...
  3. Hades36

    The Ideal Life (or Dreams Compromised)

    Thanks for all the responses. Its really cool reading about your lives, what you want, how thankful you are for what you have, etc. Jane, my ideal life would also have me being a sci-fi/fantasy writer and role-playing game designer. And Dagferi, it gave me warm tingles to read that you have...
  4. Hades36

    The Ideal Life (or Dreams Compromised)

    I hope everyone had a great holiday, however you choose to celebrate. Nearing 40 and really thinking about my life, the decisions I've made, and where those paths have led me. All in all, I have a great life with very little to complain about. But, of course, there are dreams I've compromised...
  5. Hades36

    Polyamory and Ethnicity

    I think, poly or not, we all bring our prejudices into every aspect of our lives. Here in Philly, the poly group is mostly White but its not because they haven't reached out to other races, it because other races haven't wanted to be a part of their particular circle. I don't know why, really...
  6. Hades36

    Polyamory and Ethnicity

    Wow, I just read your entire post. Loving it! I wish you lived closer to Philly. My wife and I are engaging in just this sort of dialogue with our community (Mount Airy, PA) about race (and gender, sexual orientation, spirituality, etc.) We do monthly Conversation Cafes where bring together a...
  7. Hades36

    Polyamory and Ethnicity

    Back in this lol... Yes, Black people are VERY POLY...but for some weird reason we don't call it that. Its actually a really deeply ingrained and accepted part of Black culture, at least from my experiences. Its funny, I had a conversation with a new female friend just recently. I had suggested...
  8. Hades36

    Polyamory and Ethnicity

    @Tonberry: Not sure where you are from, but anyone with some street sense recognizes where they are and are not welcome in the urban sprawl without needing a sign that says, "For White Only" or "For Lesbians Only". There are some Irish pubs in South Philly where everyone knows you do not go...
  9. Hades36

    Polyamory and Ethnicity

    @Helo I understand and respect what you are saying about how unconscious racism could possibly make discussing race even more difficult and tense. But, in my own experience, being aware of my unconscious racism (and sexism, and homophobia) have helped me dig deep, grab some of the uglier parts...
  10. Hades36

    Polyamory and Ethnicity

    Several of you have suggested that Black people do not participate in polyamory the same way White people do, or that poly "seems" to be a primarily White phenomenon. My point is that, if you do not engage with Black people on a regular basis, how would you even know? If I have to explain what...
  11. Hades36

    So ya like RPG's....NICE!

    So ya like RPG's....NICE!
  12. Hades36

    Hobbies

    Tabletop Roleplaying Games Video Games Writing Fiction & Poet DIY Projects Reading Sci-fi/Fantasy Weightlifting Cooking Cats Guns/Shooting Range Swinging Sex/Romance
  13. Hades36

    I would check out the book The Ethical Slut to start. There is also a great website called...

    I would check out the book The Ethical Slut to start. There is also a great website called jujumama that I keep venturing back to.
  14. Hades36

    Polyamory and Ethnicity

    One question for all of the White people on here who said that, yes, most of the people they have observed in poly are also White... How often and deeply do you engage with Black people? Do you attend Black events? Have more than 1 Black friend? Go to Black clubs? Have intimate conversations...
  15. Hades36

    Polyamory and Ethnicity

    Wow, you folks are STILL discussing this topic! Awesome! I find so many more intelligent conversations on this forum than I do the Swingers Board forum I also belong to! :D
  16. Hades36

    Polyamory and Ethnicity

    Oh, my other thing is that I LOVE older women..salt and pepper hair is a big YES!
  17. Hades36

    Polyamory and Ethnicity

    @Helo So you also do not believe in unconscious sexism, ageism, nationalism, cultural bias, etc.? I mean, its cool if you don't. Hey, live and live, right? But I tend to go with the idea that a lot of our behavior is shaped by unconscious forces that, if not examined, can cause us a lot of...
  18. Hades36

    Polyamory and Ethnicity

    @nycindie: I personally believe that the illusion of poly being a "mostly White phenomenon" is one based on lack of knowledge about and connection between races. Its like how I always thought serious, committed relationships were mainly a "heterosexual thing" until I started meeting and...
  19. Hades36

    Polyamory and Ethnicity

    Philly is a very segregated city, Helo. So, yes, maybe it is about location. I can only go on what I have seen and heard in my own experiences and do my best to extrapolate a theory from that admittedly limited data.
  20. Hades36

    Polyamory and Ethnicity

    This is a great topic! Thank you for starting the thread, Helo! :D I've seen a few things that I would like to offer to the discussion. I preface this by saying my comments are about Black and White people specifically although I realize, as we all do, race and ethnicity encompass a much...
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