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  1. C

    Knowing Intellectually vs. Really Feeling

    Not at all. As crude as it may seem, there's no denying that the discrimination that poly folks claim to receive, is often compared to the discrimination that homosexuals face. And while it's true that the conservative right likes to lump a lot of groups they oppose together, they really don't...
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    Knowing Intellectually vs. Really Feeling

    What I mean is, that even if I believe their sincerity (in this case, loving infinitely), I am not compelled to believe that what they're feeling is accurate. Now, if that makes me a jerk, then so be it. I'm not out to convince anyone that my way is the only true way, and I certainly don't...
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    Knowing Intellectually vs. Really Feeling

    Actually, a feeling is a noun (person, place, thing or idea). But you're confusing the issue. How we experience something does not define what it is, or what "quantity" (for lack of a better word) it exists in. Who you love is probably not who I love, what makes you happy isn't necessarily what...
  4. C

    Knowing Intellectually vs. Really Feeling

    While I won't speak for all monos in that regard, I will say that when I deny that love is infinite, it's in regards to those who claim it is, is IS. Not once have I seen someone say "love is infinite FOR ME", poly of otherwise. It's always been expressed as though it were a fact that those of...
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    Knowing Intellectually vs. Really Feeling

    Well, I'd say fire is a bit of a stretch. And while I hope that comparing the poly struggle, to what homosexuals have had to endure was more of a tongue and cheek reference on your part, I'm sure they could do a much better job highlighting their true hurdles for a proper perspective. So I won't...
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    Knowing Intellectually vs. Really Feeling

    Does that make you the pot or the kettle? Sorry, but when one group refers to the other as unnatural, controlling, codependent, brainwashed, gullible, unloving, and are accused of being unable to let go of religious and/or societal influence, they don't get to play the victim.
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    Knowing Intellectually vs. Really Feeling

    No, I didn't get the impression that you were denying my experience. So no worries there. As for my remark about everyone having their limits, please know that I wasn't making a generalization about poly people, but rather people in general. Myself included. Granted, there are exceptions to...
  8. C

    Knowing Intellectually vs. Really Feeling

    Alright look, I'm sorry if my replies were a bit short. With sometimes 3 or 4 different people commenting at once, I'm not able to get out a full reply. Not to mention, this is an extremely sensitive subject to me, so I often get a bit worked up, and can't quite muster a coherent thought. But...
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    Knowing Intellectually vs. Really Feeling

    Of course the results are not guaranteed. However, in terms of likelihood, the results are more favored. Like lunabunny said a few posts up, there is intent that plays an important role. And the point about the pie graph was simply to illustrate that something's got to give. We all have our...
  10. C

    Knowing Intellectually vs. Really Feeling

    Not quantifiable in the sense you described previously, of course not. We're not talking about units of measurement, but terms of "more" or "less", absolutely. Shallow? Not at all. Quite the opposite in fact. Calling something love, yet, not being willing to express it would be shallow &...
  11. C

    Knowing Intellectually vs. Really Feeling

    I never said it can grow infinitely that way. I never said it can grow infinitely at all. Nor do I think that one should give away all of their resources to anyone. Especially if you have kids/parents. And just so we're clear, none of what I'm saying is meant for advice on what anyone SHOULD do...
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    Knowing Intellectually vs. Really Feeling

    Oh come now, you know that only physical objects can fill a bucket right? You seem to forget that I had previously said that "quantifiable" may not be the right word. Now, even if the concept of love is infinite, that's not how we operate. The emotions themselves are what's important, as well...
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    Knowing Intellectually vs. Really Feeling

    I think I'm a little lost on this too. Because from here, it seems like you're suggesting that relationships are not necessary for love, and vice versa. Which would then make love rather meaningless. In which case, why take such exception? If love is just some overly abundant concept so far...
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    Knowing Intellectually vs. Really Feeling

    Obviously, there's a fundamental disconnect. While quantifying may not be the right word, it's certainly a resource that has to be manifested. Often with things like time, and sometimes money. This isn't to suggest the attitude like "he bought me a car, therefore he loves me", but it's easy to...
  15. C

    Knowing Intellectually vs. Really Feeling

    It all depends on the timescale. It's not about never eating again, or never loving again, or whatever else. I've already explained this, and still, you choose to ignore it. Love, food, time, etc... The question isn't whether enough means you'll ultimately run out, or run out of need, it's...
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    Knowing Intellectually vs. Really Feeling

    Of course, if there's no respect towards anyone, then there shouldn't be a relationship. Yes, I was speaking with respect included. But this notion that the individual is somehow MORE important than the relationship isn't something I see as healthy, but rather, selfish thinking. And no, I'm...
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    Knowing Intellectually vs. Really Feeling

    Again, I've not said that I, nor anyone else for that matter cannot love more than one person. I seriously don't know why you keep with that straw man argument. What I've said was that the more one loves, the more it gets diluted among the crowd. Now, while I'm glad we at least agree that not...
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    Knowing Intellectually vs. Really Feeling

    Of course they're fallacies. Do parents turn off love for one child to love another? Of course not, but the love is divided between the children. I never said one can't love multiple people at once, but the more people loved, the more that love is diminished among them. Most won't admit it, but...
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    Knowing Intellectually vs. Really Feeling

    Not so much "anti-poly", but rather pointing out a couple of flaws when it comes to human interaction & relationships. If fewer people would quit sugar coating everything with fallacies about "infinite love", and claiming that partner A is "still enough" despite wanting to fuck someone else...
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