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  1. Acroxander

    still struggling...

    The discrepancy here seems to be how you and he define "quality time." Don't you live together? Have you recently, say, watched a movie with him when he could have been out with others, or perhaps just hung around? There are other factors to consider. Is he working erratically? Does he...
  2. Acroxander

    Sacrifice, Post-Puritanism, and the Usual Suspects

    I understand this sentiment, and I am very careful about avoiding projection of what I believe onto others (I wrote A LOT of people TEND to think . . . as opposed to "People think.") I suppose my meaning became lost in the text somewhere. :D These aren't attacks by any means, simply...
  3. Acroxander

    Sacrifice, Post-Puritanism, and the Usual Suspects

    So earlier today I quoted a quote from one of you on the board, (I don't recall who, but it is in your signature :D ) and pasted it into my facebook status. Here is the quote: "Love withers under constraint; its very essence is liberty. It is compatible neither with envy, jealousy or fear...
  4. Acroxander

    The Eternal Search - San Diego is a Deadzone

    San Diego indeed Yes, there seems to be not just a lack of polyamorous folks in San Diego; no one seems to have even HEARD of poly around here. What could be the reason for it? Who knows? San Diego seems to me to be, culturally speaking, around 5-7 years behind the rest of California, or...
  5. Acroxander

    Running Advice

    Running. . . This is an interesting post to me, David. . . Is this whole thing a metaphor, or are you really running a 5k and asking for advice about it in the "New to Poly" section of a Polyamorous Forum website? My advice to you (about, literally, running) is to train on your own and...
  6. Acroxander

    I Just Met You, and I Love You!

    Hi! Welcome aboard. I hope our input or feedback is helpful for you, even though I believe we're all learning, ourselves. So, I don't get it, what's sad about this introduction?
  7. Acroxander

    g/f is changing, now I feel uncomfortable

    Issues. . . Hi, RP! I may be new here and having some issues myself, but maybe I can offer perspective. If I read correctly, then your major issues are: 1: Your own burgeoning jealousy 2: Her seemingly opportunistic approach to polyamory. 3(?): The fact that it sounds like the two of you...
  8. Acroxander

    Hey, you! I'm offering you virtual friendship on FB. You can find me as Alexander Dial in San...

    Hey, you! I'm offering you virtual friendship on FB. You can find me as Alexander Dial in San Diego, CA. My circus page, Otherwise Entertainment, may be easier to find, as some folks have claimed I've been difficult to locate. . .
  9. Acroxander

    The Shift from Mono to Poly

    New developments RedPepper- I agree. I'm moving along nice and slowly for her. I didn't plan on leaping into a diamond situation immediately and just telling her to deal with it as though she's got years of poly living under her belt. :) I *HAVE* arranged my first official date outside of...
  10. Acroxander

    The Shift from Mono to Poly

    I totally agree with this sentiment. Thanks, all for your help with my perspective! I'll keep you posted.
  11. Acroxander

    The Shift from Mono to Poly

    Thanks, everyone. I've really taken the applicable stuff to heart, and I'm going to proceed with care. I'll be around. Thanks for all the time you've spent helping me. What a great community you have here!
  12. Acroxander

    The Shift from Mono to Poly

    Great input Thank you all so much for your advice and perspectives. To clarify: We have been seeing each other for a little longer than a year, during which I have been painstakingly monogamous. I'll try to address it all in one go. Firstly, none of your feedback struck me as harsh or...
  13. Acroxander

    The Shift from Mono to Poly

    Well, my last thread had to do with me accepting my new lifestyle and telling my current GF, who was in a mono relationship with me, that I required the freedom to love as I need to love. Well, we talked a lot more last night, and she seems to want to enter this poly situation with me. Bear...
  14. Acroxander

    Poly-thinking girl here :)

    Welcome! I just joined the board today, too. Welcome! (It feels good to be part of a welcoming community, even if I'm a noob) I'm in a relationship that's ending because of our differing views on polyamory (she wants monogamy, I'm pretty sure that I can't be happy that way) so I'm just...
  15. Acroxander

    Ready to Embrace Change

    @ gs Thank you for the reception, GS. I think you're absolutely right about clear communication, since it's been my experience that when people are left with ANY "wiggle room" for interpretation, they tend to reach whatever conclusions they like, regardless of the intended message. I...
  16. Acroxander

    Ready to Embrace Change

    Hi, I'm new to this site, but I've been looking for a place to express myself frankly and without worrying about backlash from the morally superior or those who can't think outside their own situations. I have long, long known about polyamory and it's fundamental theory and practice, but I've...
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