bar scene sucks?

M

mgreen1104

New member
Hey guys :)

So I went out for the first time the other night just to meet people, not for sex or anything, but just to meet friends. In a six-hour period, I went to four bars. It may have been that it was a Thursday night, but they were all empty, which at first was very strange, but the people who were there came with friends and closed their groups off to outsiders. I had fun just talking to random people over the night, but no one that I felt could turn into a friendship, let alone a relationship.

Can anyone can help me think of some ideas to maybe meet people other than a bar? That was more cliche than I figured. lol

Also, what is everyone's thoughts on meeting someone online? I actually emailed someone back on Craigslist. They replied back very enthusiastic, then asked for my picture. I know I'm not the best-looking guy in the world, and I'm not very photogenic. When I sent what I thought was the best picture I had, I didn't hear a word from her. Does that mean she was shallow from the get-go, or am I being paranoid? I don't want to judge people or assume things, but that's just what I felt happened.

I do really like this lifestyle, and I know that it's not something that happens overnight for either my wife or me. I just want to understand. Thank you, guys.
 
Hey. I always find the best way to meet people is to do something that I'm interested in. I've found getting involved in groups, clubs, seminars and the like to be excellent ways to make new friends.

The other thing I find really useful is to spend time with friends who I know are good at the thing I want to get good at.

And lots of people are really helpful if you tell them that you think they are fabulous at something and that you'd like to learn some of their skill.

Good luck,
IP
 
Most people go to clubs for one of two reasons: to dance, or to hook-up (engage in casual sexual acts), or both. Either way, not an ideal way to start long-term relationships.

OKC has been good for meeting people, but I've never had a fulfilling relationship through it. I met my husband at a fetish event and the event's ongoing online forum, a discussion group not unlike this one, but all centered around the kink scene of one small city.

The point is, do what you're going to do anyway, and just get out a lot and talk to people. Things will line up when they're meant to.
 
Bars? Why bother?

Meet people doing something you like, or something you're curious about. The only thing you know you'll have in common with someone at a bar is drinking, and frankly, that doesn't seem to be a good basis to a relationship (in my opinion, anyway).

But if you're interested in, say, archery or hunting, join an archery club. If you're interested in plants, join a gardening or botany club. Then you know that you'll have something worthwhile in common with absolutely everyone there. Though you might not be able to find a relationship fall into your lap that way, you can expand your friends circle, which is (in my moderate experience) an awesome way to find people who have things in common, which can more easily lead to finding compatible potential partners.

Friendships first; relationships come at their own pace.
 
ViableAlternative said:
Bars? Why bother?

Meet people doing something you like, or something you're curious about. The only thing you know you'll have in common with someone at a bar is drinking, and frankly, that doesn't seem to be a good basis to a relationship (in my opinion, anyway).
Click to expand...

"Like" !
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top